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Question:

What do you think of this poem?

I see in the world
people with wealth
who, from delusion,
don't make a gift
of the treasure they've gained.
Greedy, they stash it away,
hoping for even more
sensual pleasures.

A king who, by force,
has conquered the world
and rules over the earth
to the edge of the sea,
dissatisfied with the ocean's near shore,
longs for the ocean's
far shore as well.

Kings & others
— plenty of people —
go to death with craving
unabated. Unsated,
they leave the body behind,
having not had enough
of the world's sensual pleasures.

One's relatives weep
& pull out their hair.
'Oh woe, our loved one is dead,' they cry.
Carrying him off,
wrapped in a piece of cloth,
they place him
on a pyre,
then set him on fire.

So he burns, poked with sticks,
in just one piece of cloth,
leaving all his possessions behind.
They are not shelters for one who has died —
not relatives,
friends,
or companions.

His heirs take over his wealth,
while the being goes on,
in line with his kamma.
No wealth at all

Additional Details

3 months ago
follows the dead one —
not children, wives,
dominion, or riches.

Long life
can't be gotten with wealth,
nor aging
warded off with treasure.
The wise say this life
is next to nothing —
impermanent,
subject to change.

The rich & the poor
touch the touch of Death.
The foolish & wise
are touched by it, too.
But while fools lie as if slain by their folly,
the wise don't tremble
when touched by the touch.

Thus the discernment by which
one attains to mastery,
is better than wealth —
for those who haven't reached mastery
go from existence to existence,
out of delusion,
doing bad deeds.

3 months ago
i didn't write it by the way, so im not taking credit for it or anything


Best Answer - Chosen by Asker:

good you didn't write it.
First question is the additional detail part of the poem? Find a way of making it visible when one tries to analyze the poem. Its not visible and appears disconnected!
Secondly, in my view it is a bit mechanical, not quite memorable. Sounds like the poet is envious and wishes to see rulers and henchmen condemned to the abyss!
Kind of reads like disguised hatred masquerading as humanistic concern.
I'd advise the poet of the Lord's memorable wise counsel: "Vengeance is mine, and I shall repay."

Otherwise, fair attempt, be encouraged.