I wrote another poem, what do you think??

Question:

I wrote another poem, what do you think??

This poem was just written when I was creatively drained, and I needed a good boost. The poem is actually about a father, no not my father, I love my father (99% of the time) and he is not dead. The poem's about a dead father, from a daughter's point of view. Just let me know what you think!

I never thought I'd have to push and shove,
just for a bit of my father's love.
He never called me "daddy's little girl",
Never spun me into a childish twirl.
He never read me a tale from my favorite story book,
Never helped me make a clubhouse in a small private nook.
He never danced with me in the rain,
he never kissed away the pain.
He never taught me how to wait,
But now it's too late.

He never crossed the street holding my hand tight,
Never chased away the monster in the middle of the night.
He never looked at me in awe with pride,
He never came to comfort me when I cried,
So how come I feel his arms around me, after he's died

Additional Details

3 months ago
I need some titles, any ideas???

3 months ago
I know it may add to the shock value, but I'm 13. I don't know any where who'll accept an entry from a 13 year old.

3 months ago
Lost Love
A Father's Love
Love Lacking
Lacking Love
His Arms

Best Answer - Chosen by Asker:

Don't worry about Andrea's comments. I've read the same answer to another poem that was available in Answers today. They can't both be the worst poem she ever read. Actually, the other comment was signed Strathha, but they use the same language, including the cocaine crack. Something weird is going on.
In fact, your poem is a lot better than the other one. I have been a judge in a poetry contest and yours is probably better than about half of what gets turned in to college level poetry contests.
Nevertheless, it could use a lot of work. More concrete imagery, more figures of speech and a better sense of meter would all help.
Who cares whether you are thirteen? When you send in your poem you don't have to tell anyone how old you are. However, I would not expect this poem to be published unless you come across an editor who hopes to make money off of you.
My over all intention here is to tell you that you are talented and should be proud of that, but you still have a lot of work to do.