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Please take a look at my poem..and let me know what you think.?

Hey everyone---thank you for taking the time to read this...
just go to the site
http://www.xanga.com/ladyalyssespoems...
My poem is titled--If My Heart Had Words
I am going through a very upsetting break up--and wrote out a few of my emotions in this poem. I never write poems...
but just wondering the opinions of other people.
Please do not be rude and tell me that I am some emo girl who should just go slit my wrists. This is something I am passionate about..my heart aching...but I am anything but emo.

If anyone dislikes it---please do not tell me it was a waste of your time--and that I am selfish. I am just simply just writing about what I want out of a relationship that I obviously didnt get in this past one.

Anyways-thanks for your time.


Best Answer - Chosen by Asker:

Are you looking for an opinion on the poem or on your emotions? Because if you truly want opinions on the poem itself, you cant really expect only the positive comments. I liked the poem at 'look , I wanted to be loved right' everything after that was fairly good. Before that line, some sentences were good but had a couple of unneeded/unnecessary words in them. Others seemed only like blubbering rants. Potentially a good poem rewritten and edited a bit.