How do you like my poem. How can i make it better.?

Question:

How do you like my poem. How can i make it better.?

Give me some feedback good/bad
I want any ideas to improve it...

On the Other Side Of Paradise.

My Eyes Are Drawn To This Dismissed And Forgotten Place.
Which Moves In Rhythm And Imperfection Leaves No Trace.
While Birds Bathe In The Spring, Color And Light Shine Threw The Vultures Blackened Wing.
Sounds Float By In The Slow Breeze.
I Hear Flying Leaves, Hovering Bees And None But Peaceful Things.
A Never Ending Slow Dance, Always Moving Together.
A World So Apart Lasting Forever.
No future. No past.
The world is perfect
Right here, Right now
On the other side of this window of glass.

Best Answer - Chosen by Asker:

i enjoyed the poem but i would remove the word imperfection and also instead of the word none i would put the word nothing in its place but other than that i really like it