This is the middle of chapter 1!. I wrote a lot and this is a small part!. How can i improve!?
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I suddenly opened my eyes, and shook my head from side to side to clear the memory out!. I don’t mind dying right now; I am dying every second any way!. Death would be a respite!. I stood there on the side walk of unfamiliar street waiting for death to come to greet me, to take me away, to welcome me!. I shivered and waited!.
“Is that Eva!?” I heard someone say behind me!.
I didn’t turn around; the voice wasn’t a bit familiar!.
“What is she doing here!?” a female voice answered!. Than I turned around!. Maybe death had finally decided to come!. Her cold voice made me shiver even more, it left me breathless, than I turned around!. My eyes wide with fright!. Why was I scared, isn’t death what I wanted!.
“Lane!?” I asked with shock and fear in my voice!.
“What you think you are doing here!?” She asked, anger filled her voice!.
Her strawberry blond hair was dripping wet on the ground!. All what I could hear is the drops on of the water on the ground, the whole ground was spinning!. I couldn’t reply, I tried to talk to tell her that I will leave but part of me didn’t want to leave that part wanted to stay and take death!. I remember that day where Lane’s brother died, and my step dad Sam got blamed for it but a year later they found out that Sam was innocent, but Lane and her family never bought that!. I can see the pain in her eyes, the pain of loss!. She had told me if she ever sees me that I will be her victim, that she won’t mind spending the rest of her life behind bars!. She will take revenge for her brother from my family when she can, and now I am offering her what she wanted for the past three years!. I saw her come closer to me, her steps were growing louder and louder, I can feel that my ear drums can’t take it anymore!. Should I run!? Should I scream!? I learned some self defense in my P!.E class I can just hit her and run away when she decides to strike!. But I didn’t know if that was the ideal thing to do!.
“Grab her!” she yelled at the unfamiliar male next to her!. He looked at her like she was saying some kind of joke, than he realized that she was serious and he did as she demanded!. He grabbed me and pushed me to the ground!.
“It been a while haven’t Eva!? Oh haven knows how long I’ve been waiting for this, to take every single piece of you out! To take your heart out of you chest! Your eyes out of your face!.” Then I noticed something polished in her hands, I gasped!. A knife!. I felt my stomach twist into pieces, all what I can feel is my heart jump out of my chest I felt that my heart is trying to rip out of my chest!. All what I can feel is fear!. Is my soul that important to me that all what I feel is fear!. There was no one on the street to witness my death!. Lane kept on talking some nonsense I couldn’t keep up on what she was saying, why she is taking for ever!. Just get it over with, get it over with I kept on saying over and over in my head!. Suddenly I felt something smash on my leg, and then I collapsed to the ground, I felt great pain on my left foot!.
“Nooooo!” I screamed!. Pain filled all my body; I couldn’t breath I was gasping
For air, my body felt numb, I was dizzy everything around me was spinning!.
“That hurts doesn’t!? You should feel how my brother felt! How I felt, how I freaking felt! You monster!.” Then she took the knife out of my left leg!. I screamed, it was the loudest thing I ever heard myself do!.
“Lane, I think we should go! Lane! No! NO DON’T” The male voice was full of panic!. Then I felt something sharp going in my stomach!.”Www@QuestionHome@Com