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Question: Comment on my poem please its only a first draft!?
Take me to where the sun does shine
your wisdom and naivety reluctantly combined
a place for two lost souls to intertwine
Ticking clocks of virtuous time!.

Don’t try to understand what you can’t control
your destiny is that of the path of your soul
No wind favours he without a goal
And no chose conclusion there’s a hidden toll

Countless metaphors that define certain bliss
with one chose all could be dismissed
Never let our dreams remiss
Don’t join the endless loveless list

I will stand always by your side
Lets get carried away by the rising tide!.
Only in your heart my head will chose to hide
I vow to vied for your love i will always strive

Lose a grasp of all that’s real
Temptation salvation nothing to conceal
Just let it come and let it flow
Easy come and easy go!.



There maybe spelling mistakes but easy fixed tell me if your a proffesional and know what your on about thank you!.

Already posted this but didnt get the response i was after so i will try again!.
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Best Answer - Chosen by Asker:
That is very good and I found no real errors just reading!. Www@QuestionHome@Com