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Question: I have written a sijo it is a Korean art form!. Could I get some constructive critiques !?
Korean sijo
Sijo (the word is both singular and plural) also resembles haiku in having a strong foundation in nature, but its lines average 14-16 syllables, for a total of 44-46

Complex rockwork lines the path way approaching the waterfall
As its steady murmurs entice me closer; in vivid colors,
The morning sun paints the sky; I fall into nature’s trance

Approaching silently observant in my surroundings
Anticipation of cool water, on my body, running
I quiver, contentedly slipping through the water’s surface

Mornings flush diminishes as clouds intercept the colors
Wind, flicking leaves, sundry rhythm create; as song birds trill
Emerging refreshed, by the waterfalls spray, my soul is sated


This poem was maliciously deleted so I am reposting it!. I have appealed its removal!. Rest assured that my Korean friends have given me the green light and have said I am welcome to visit!.Www@QuestionHome@Com


Best Answer - Chosen by Asker:
nope!.!.!.no critiques!.!.!.!.!.just compliments to the poet!.!.!.!.i have noticed there is a jerk on poetry who reports and thumbs down good people!.!.!.what kind of life must someone have to pick on poets!.!.!.hmmmWww@QuestionHome@Com