Reflecting Alone
I'm sitting on my roof with a pen and some paper
I have some stuff to do but I guess I'll do it later
There's some words in my mind that are inscribed in my heart
The pen bleeds out the feelings that are pouring from my heart
Writing has never been so hard or this difficult to do
I never found it simple but I always made it through
But this time it's different, when I write a word, I cry
I can't hold back these tears, can someone tell me why
I'm burning deep inside and I'm filled with so much pain
I'm lost and confused and I'm wondering if I'm sane
I'm lying on my stomach and my face is on the ground
The third year's almost over and the fourth one's coming 'round
My book is almost finished and I'm afraid of how it ends
I'm concerned about it's outcome and the message that it sends
Again I start to cry as I write the next two lines
With the way that I write, I try to portray hidden signs
My life is filled with stories and some of which are sad
But I express how I got through them, each one that I have had
When I was a little younger, I had my heart set on this girl
She didn't know I liked her, or that she played a big part in my world
I was scared and afraid of how she might react
If she saw my book from the front cover to the back
Lots of poems in my book, are about the way I feel
They aren't pointless words, rather meaningful and real
Her face is like an angels, but I could never let her know
Cause if she doesn't like me back, I might have to let her go
Like a waterfall, the tears come pouring down
Not because I'm sad but because I miss having her around
So I guess in reality that actually means I'm sad
But how could I not be when, I think of all the times we've had
Summers were the best, we would hang out all the time
But Autumn is most remembered, cause it's when I wrote my first rhyme
It was my first poem and it was influenced by love
But I never gave it to her, cause I wasn't brave enough
I stuttered when I spoke and when tried to say these words
I said “I love you!.” and she said nothing!.!.!.
That's why this is hard, what would you expect
Every day of my life can't just be another regret
Now I start to wonder, and some things are on my mind
Maybe there's still hope and a destiny that I have yet to find
But why didn't she speak, why wouldn't she respond
Three years have already come and gone
My book is almost done and I think that she might read it
She'll find my words but I wonder if she'll believe it
I can't sit on my roof, and just wonder what she'll say
But I'm too afraid to call her, and these thoughts won't go away
I wish we had some closure but at the same time I don't
Will I stop caring if she doesn't like me, something says I won't
But I have to come to the realization that she may have moved on
But whether she has or not, these feelings are not gone
But why am I so afraid of her response!.!.!.
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