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Question: What do you think of my poem!?!?!?( very short)!?
what a place!.!.what a place
every one is scared and they carry mace
drug dealers and thieves
carry knives in there sleeves
what a terrible place too live
--------------------------------------!.!.!.
just wrote that on the spot!.!.!.!.!.and i don't know why!.!.!.!.
don't suggest i put bigger, fancier words in because that's not my style
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Best Answer - Chosen by Asker:
It has an ominous tone and seems to depict a world in which mystery and darkness is at every corner!. You should develop it more in terms of describing what types of knives in their sleeves and whether it glistens off the moonlight casting a metallic ray of light upon the dreary alley way!.!.!.i don't know Www@QuestionHome@Com
Putting bigger words into your poetry would compromise who you are!. This poem is perfect because it was written by you!. Not the voice of your readers!. Who are we to judge what you write!? Because this poem is short, it leaves room for more works of art from you!. It was very good in my opinion and it catches the life on the streets in big cities in an instant, like a photograph!. Www@QuestionHome@Com
i'd say quick and good !.its a wonder full quality u posses!.but ur poem usually reflects on ur outlook!.prefer writing positive poems about topics that u fancy instead of writing so dark ones!.it is good no doubt !.and i also agree it is sometimes essential to write 'em!.but that's what i feel!.xcept that there are no notable flawsWww@QuestionHome@Com
bad spelling and grammar!. not very creative or good!.
EDIT::
the only good part is the
"everyone is scared"
it actually sends a deeper message!. but the rest is crap!.Www@QuestionHome@Com
well it makes sense to me, from where i live!. but i live in afghanistan then knives don't makes sense, since everyone own an ak!. yeah we live in a down hill world!. Www@QuestionHome@Com
poetry is all about words and you have no style, you need to understand your own thought prosess so if you don't know why you wrote it whats the point!?Www@QuestionHome@Com
The last three lines are great! You could work on the first two, to tighten it up a bit, if the second line had less syllables it would flow better!.
I really love the concept behind it!. Well done!.Www@QuestionHome@Com
gAnGsTa!Www@QuestionHome@Com
Ught oh!.!.!.lol That's pretty creative!. I wish I could just come up with something like that off the top of my head!.Www@QuestionHome@Com
Eh first two lines were crap lolWww@QuestionHome@Com
GOODWww@QuestionHome@Com
AH FUKKIN SH!T MAN WASSUP WITH DA VODKA!?!?!?!?!?Www@QuestionHome@Com