Position:Home>Poetry> I need help, with my Ballad Poem. I have already written it I just need help fix

It's not a bad poem, but it doesn't fit the normal form of a "ballad" poem!. A ballad poem is a narrative poem with a few varieties of rhyming patterns and beat counts!. You chose the four line stanza mode, which is usually have alternating four stress and three stress lines, where the 2nd and 4th lines rhyme!. Your rhyme pattern is correct, but not your beats!. For example, in stanza one, you have 3/4/4/3!.5 (if you add an "a" between "for" and "long" in line 2)!.!.!.here is how you might "fix" it:

I am always online searching
For a long lost friend
Wondering where he is today
I hope to make amends

You can say "amends" and still comply with the rhyme because the major sounds still work (more than slant rhyme, but quite perfect rhyme)!.

The second stanza is 3!.5/3/3/3!.5!.!.!.so I'd recommend the following:

I know I've made many mistakes
I have so much regret
It's time to say I'm very sorry
I don't want him upset

The third stanza is 3!.5/3/3!.5/3!.!.!.so I'd recommend the following:

Finally! At last he's found
No longer am I a fool
I am to blame, it's all my fault
How could I be so cruel!?

Finally, stanza four is 3!.5/3/3!.5/3!.!.!.so I'd recommend the following:

I'll make it right, I'll make amends
I promise to be true
I've change entire my faulty ways
Because I still love you

The problem that will remain in the last stanza is that you went from taking "about" him to talking directly "to" him!. Therefore, you might want to either change the previous stanzas so they speak "to" him, or change the last stanza so you speak "about" him!. You might end it with a last line like: In hope he loves me too!.

If you want the last line to remain the same, simply change the "he" and "him" to "you", and "he's" to "you're"!.

Although not the only way to edit your ballad, it will hopefully set you on the right path!.

Www@QuestionHome@Com

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i dont believe its bad!. i like it, actually!. maybe between "I have made many mistakes,
I have so much regret!.
It’s time to say I’m sorry!.
I know he must be upset!.

andd!.!.!.

Finally I’ve found him!.
I’m no longer a fool!.
I know I’m the one at fault!.
How could I’ve been so cruel!?"

you could put a small hint about why you are sorry!. because that is not clearly expressed!. other than that, i like your poem (=Www@QuestionHome@Com

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