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Question: Just a little something I wrote!? I wonder how bad it sucks!? !?
Constructive Criticism Is my friend - so yeah tare it apart :) Thanks

Titled : Over Extended

My heart swells with Grief
I cannot even find my heart
I feel the tears fall, the warmth of their pain
But where is my warm heart
Why is it breaking, when I cannot even find it

Your so far away
So lost from even yourself
And yet I see you
I can feel your warmth, your heart, your pain

I see you contort and agonize
I reach out
You slap my hand
Bad Girl
Bad Baby
Now Now go on, mind your own business

I can’t see through the glaze of my eyes
The Pain of my Gut, sinking and dazed I reach out

Where are you, I call out wondering and ashamed
You don’t come

Wait…… I feel you I knew you would come
Wait ……!. You feel strange sadness
Who is this

I find My Lords Hand…!.!.
Pull it to my head
Like a Monkey looking for grooming
God pulls me close I nuzzle in press in
He pets my head Stroking me Like a father does His Child

Rest, Fear not
The tears flow so lovingly pouring into His lap so strong like they will never end
My heart there it is
Reaching out to you
To cover your pain
With my love

Your so far away
Do you recognize who you are
Do you remember your Dreams
Do you remember a time when there was only the world at your finger tips, did you ever feel that way

Your so beautiful
Such an Amazing creation
Lost in lies
Hopeless and sad
Scared and alone

Can I reach out to Love you My friend
Anger, self righteous pride, Self condemnation filled with the pain and lies of this world gone bad
Recoiled I grow distant and faint
Confused, My flesh burns with disappointment and hurt
Words bring death, Words are power

Control………………
Wait
be not drunk with wine, wherein is excess; but be filled with the Spirit

Words Yes Words bring life
Words bring Hope
Words bind
Words up rise
Words encourage

Filled with Love, peace beyond human understanding, strength of the spirit not the Flesh
Lean not unto My understanding but Gods who ways are Higher than Mine!. Living by faith not by sight
Love it loves always standing on the promises of God not that of the worlds who would have me walk away

Control, Power, Words, Choice

I will give and when I am empty I will lay my head back into the lap of my one and only father and let Him pour His spirit into filling me with His love emptying myself of Me,
So long Self there is no room for you here in this temple of the Lord!.

I reach out Www@QuestionHome@Com


Best Answer - Chosen by Asker:
confusing!.!.!.its all over the placeWww@QuestionHome@Com

Good for you!. It takes courage to write something personal and put it out there in a public forum!. It came from your ? and I do not know if I got the meaning of the poem but I still felt I could relate on a personal level!.Www@QuestionHome@Com

I personally like this poem it is original and you expressed what you felt/feel a poem is a form of self expression its art this is very powerful I am glad that you have come to know the Lord on a personal levelWww@QuestionHome@Com