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Position:Home>Poetry> What do you think of my simple poem? - Advice and oppions welcomed!?Question: What do you think of my simple poem!? - Advice and oppions welcomed!!? Standing there
Without a sound Gently swaying Collapsed to the ground Struggling to live Can’t take a breath Lying on the ground Ending with death Tears streamed Grief was around The words unspoken Sadness was the sound Hey everyone, i'm 15 and i wrote this!.!. yet again, it is fake!.!.!. uh!.!. It is meant to be about a mother loosing her baby, as it dies with little warning!. hope you like it!. yes comments are very welcome!.Www@QuestionHome@Com Best Answer - Chosen by Asker: Another good write!. I like the flow of your poetry, most most I've read-have to do with loss and grief!. I hope you keep up with the good writes!. :)Www@QuestionHome@Com That's a terribly sad subject matter you've chosen to write about!. Well, it's not obvious what you are writing about!. If you want to write cohesive poetry you must learn to write with what I call meat to the bones!. This means let the people know what you are writing about!. I've been writing for 25 years and I've learned a few things!. I think this will make you a better writer!. I also think you should read other published poet's poetry to see how it's done!. For 15 you're young and learning!. I bid you good luck!.Www@QuestionHome@Com It requires far more complexity and depth in order to do such a serious subject justice!. A little too trivial in its execution for the topic it attempts to address!.Www@QuestionHome@Com it is a good poem n that to being a 15 u have written such a good poem to be honest , i like itWww@QuestionHome@Com It's alright!.Www@QuestionHome@Com Good Poem at 15 Keep writing some thing that's Positive tooWww@QuestionHome@Com |