Position:Home>Poetry> What do you think to these?
Question: What do you think to these!?
'I love you'
Was this for real
A tiny paper note
Saying how you feel
High school love
Don't you remember
The best years of my life
Ended one December
I heard the news
From a man on tv
A shocking event
Your parents blame me
You went out alone
You stupid boy
With the gun that I gave you
It wasn't a toy
A bullet through the heart
And a note in your hand
I guess it was my fault
I didn't understand
Love is why we're here today
Love for all to see
Without the love I'm talkin' 'bout
There'd be no you or me
So thankyou love for keeping me
Upon this dreadful planet
Love I owe you, honestly
But now your gone god damn it
And when you left you took him
You broke us apart
Love has turned to hate now
And I need a new start
Happiness is everywhere
Happiness all around
Happiness that you have lost
Happiness I found
Happiness can live in books
Happiness in trees
Happiness is eveywhere
Happiness to pleaseWww@QuestionHome@Com
Best Answer - Chosen by Asker:
Hey perfect u know I cant say ur poems aren't good!.
just keep on writing poems so I can read more!.
also what poet of the night is true, once u write or make something it belongs to u no one else!.
smile ;) Www@QuestionHome@Com
I am no expert on poetry, but I enjoyed reading them and found them very meaningful!. If you are a serious writer of poetry, should you do something about copyright so that people do not copy your work and use it as their own!?!?!?!?Www@QuestionHome@Com
this is really said, is it true!?Www@QuestionHome@Com
I have a feeling I'll be saying this a lot!.
If you're going to rhyme you need metrics!. Think of metrics like the beat of a song, except it has to do with emphasis on your words!. When it comes to metrics, most people know iambic pentameter!. I'm not saying use it, it's just the most common way!.
I'm just going to use the two stanzas above this block for an example!.
Your metrics is set out by "so thank you love for keeping me//upon this dreadful planet!." As you can see, your first sentence has eight syllables with an emphasis on every two (the upbeat in musical terms!.) Your second line is seven, which is a common, though interesting switch!.
However in the next stanza you start with "and when you left you took him" which violates your laid out metrics!. That has seven, not the eight you had!.
I won't get into it more than that!. Your metrics, though partially established are very sloppy!. Your rhymes are simple and boring!.
As is this poem!. I have no idea what the last part is for, nor why you would do such a thing except that you weren't sticking to your metrics in the first place!.
As for copyright, if you write the words they're yours!. When people "copyright" something it's only a legal formality that is generally for logos, catch phrases or the like!. But for a work of art, if anyone steals it then you have right to sue them, since you wrote it first, whether it's published or not!.
But you don't need to worry!. No self respecting poet would steal this!.Www@QuestionHome@Com