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Question: How good is that 1st cup!?

1st Cup Eyes See

Deep sea sounds
Drown yesterday
Fathoms blue revive me

East breaks the day
The moment pristine
Peaceful eyes see

Damn, this a good cup

?rad092908



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Best Answer - Chosen by Asker:
The last line is the best line! It's short & sweet! To the point!! I like your poem! The first cup is always the best cup as long as you didn't get it from 2 girls!!! lolWww@QuestionHome@Com

Two suggestions:

1!. since your first two lines complete a single phrase, do the same with the second stanza!.!.!.try,

East breaks the day
In a moment pristine
Peaceful eyes see

and

2!. "Damn, this is a good cup" !.!.!."this a good cup" sounds too awkward!.

!.!.!.you had good images, keep writingWww@QuestionHome@Com

freshly brewed aroma drifts from kitchen to me!.!.!.!.!.nothing beats that first cup at dark thirty in the morning!. niceWww@QuestionHome@Com

I enjoyed the last line!. It brought clarity and reality to the etherealness of the poem!. ?Www@QuestionHome@Com

Uh oh, Kevin's on you!. He's worse than the Poetry Police!. The last line just needs to go!. This is very good, without the expletive!.Www@QuestionHome@Com

This is very nice!. I can't imagine what it would be like to have that 1st cup gazing at open sea in all directions!.!.!.Very nice image indeed!.Www@QuestionHome@Com

Good onyer!!! Seeing what you love revives the spiritedness of you!
Peaceful eyes see this as one damn good poem!!!
I'm finished now!.Www@QuestionHome@Com

Damn, that was a good drink!

Hugs, maWww@QuestionHome@Com

OK,,,I won't read the last line,,,,I still like it though,,,

Hey ,,,I thought you left to go play Popeye!?!?

Or Am I Mistaken!?!? Www@QuestionHome@Com

Its good, as long as its full!Www@QuestionHome@Com

peaceful heart sees/sings!.Www@QuestionHome@Com