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Question: Is this a good poem I wrote today!?
Who am I!.!.!.!.!.!?
Where do I want to go!.!.!.!.!?
What do I really think of life!.!.!.!?
What are some of the things I know!.!.!.!.!?
What are all of the deeds I've done!.!.!.!.,
Are they as cold as snow!.!.!.!?
Do I lift many heatrs or throw them dowm and give them a fatal blow!.!.!.!.!?
Where will I be five years from now!.!.!.!.,
Do I have any hope!?
Is it really knowledge I want or do I want my wealth to grow!?
And all that I've know and did!.!.did I do it all for show!?
Is there really someone out there!.!.that will help me stay afloat!.!.!?
If so then where is she!.!.!.!?I've looked on many boats!.!.!.
Oh That Someone I need your help!.!.I don't know where I will go!.!.!.!?Www@QuestionHome@Com


Best Answer - Chosen by Asker:
I really love this poem to me it shows that you put real feelings into it!. I think its greatWww@QuestionHome@Com

It's Ok!. I would suggest that you go back and rethink your rhyme scheme as it has rhyme but it's not ordered so it messes up the flow!. I like the questions you're asking, but the last line is not worded as a question- is it: i don't know, where will i go!? OR i don't know where I will go!. Furthermore, I don't understand the whole cold as snow deeds imagery, but other than that keep it up!.Www@QuestionHome@Com

yeah i like the idea but im not sure why you shifted it from you to like the person you are looking for to love

idl where it says, Are they as cold as snow!.!.!.!? it doesnt really make sense, sense its deeds that you've done that your comparing and If so then where is she!.!.!.!? and Oh That Someone I need your help!.!.I don't know where I will go!.!.!.!?
and i dont like the fatal blow part


answer mine anyone!?
http://answers!.yahoo!.com/question/index;!.!.!.Www@QuestionHome@Com

yeah!. i like it!. the 'fatal blow' line is a little longwinded, i think, but other than that its really nice!.Www@QuestionHome@Com

It is nice, but try to put some statements, not only questions!Www@QuestionHome@Com

You should publish it=]Www@QuestionHome@Com

sorry but no!. It sounds like it's just a bunch of random life questions and it get a bit annoying to read!.Www@QuestionHome@Com