How is my poem please rate it from 1-10 give me comments too.?

Question: How is my poem please rate it from 1-10 give me comments too!.!?

i am trying to get this poem published please rate it for me

liquor by ailvilo

suicide in a bottle
liquor by name
you try to be ever so suttle
but everything always ends in shame
maybe your addiction was meant to be
maybe you love your liquor more than me
to me it no longer matters
just die leave go far away
just dont stay
im not your wife im your child
towards me your emotions are too wild
here i sit crying
while you sit dying
slowly
sip by sip
and i think "hurry up"Www@QuestionHome@Com

Best Answer - Chosen by Asker:

4/10!. Definitely clean up your spelling!. The rhyme is a little off; I don't see a real pattern!. When you use rhyme, you're indicating to the reader that it's a formal poem!. That's pretty out of style right now (though it's making a comeback), so it may be hard to get it published anyway!. There's also nothing new, here!. Try to think of a different way to express thoughts of suicide and alcoholism if you want to communicate those in poem!. Word of warning though: those kinds of poem have littered editors' trash cans for decades!.

You do, however, have a decent sense of rhythm, which is why you didn't get a 2 from me!. :)Www@QuestionHome@Com

Metre and spelling are lacking!. It's not terribly thoughtful; as if it took about 10 minutes to write!. 2/10 for at least not being "free verse"!.Www@QuestionHome@Com

I give that poem a 10/10!. It was amazing!. You have a gift!.Www@QuestionHome@Com

metre,spelling and rythm are lacking!.i can give a 6/10!.its a good start,carry onWww@QuestionHome@Com