Position:Home>Poetry> What can be said of this trial Dorsimbra attempt? ?
Question: What can be said of this trial Dorsimbra attempt!? !?
I looked at the format and thought hmm ok maybe I'll have a go!.
"Star Trekking Across the Universe"
By Jellz Fisher
Engaging in the voyage before us
Steps first taken into unknown places
Absorbing lightshow, black holes, full chorus
Sea of amazement, new sparkling faces
Meteoric metaphoric
Cosmic-celestial awe
Overwhelms us all
Times ceases
Senses enlivened, moving emotions
Onwards, forwards always, never go back
Universal travellers, kin spirits
Engaging in the voyage before us
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Best Answer - Chosen by Asker:
I can make the first stanza go iambic!.!.!.ab SOR bing!.!.!.see!.!.!.Www@QuestionHome@Com
Good for you! You have the form down!. Now, instead of telling us the voyage is metaphoric, show us!. This first attempt is very good!.
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I like but if I am reading the form, the first stanza must be iambic pentameter!. Still, a nice read!.Www@QuestionHome@Com
My starships late arriving but I enjoyed reading your "Dorsimbra", I might even comment further once I learn what it is!.Www@QuestionHome@Com