Would you care to comment on this pome?

Question: Would you care to comment on this pome!?

Evening on the Porch
By C!.S!. Scotkin

Triassic miniatures
fighting,
territorial disputation;
with scarlet throats
chase green ladies
all over my porch…

Time for asteroids
open door policy,
tennis ball
bounce clears,
makes way for
larger mammals!.

Prehysteric evening
caterwauling
from within,
their prey
escaped,
again!.

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Best Answer - Chosen by Asker:

Is there a G'echo in here!? (or is it a bird!?) Neonman seems to think so!.

That's some preyhistoric porch you got there CS!. Don't ya just love foodchain math!? 2Cat + (Gecko - 1 tail) + human / sliding door = Fair game + poem fodder (score is 1 all)Www@QuestionHome@Com

Maybe George and Gracie will have better luck catching the geckos next time!. Nice allusion to the Alvarez hypothesis and the Cretaceous-Tertiary boundary event (65 mya), which did of course clear the way for the emergence of mammals!. You have placed the everyday within a cosmic, and comic, framework!.!.!.nice fun poem!Www@QuestionHome@Com

I lived in S!.C!. for a few months when I was younger and I'd have to say lizards are better than mice and rats!. (Though the field mice are rather cute and only come in during the winter months!.)
Hey, what if you changed "disputation" to torch!? As in Territorial torch,/their scarlet throats!. That way all the stanzas would have the same rhyme scheme!. Just a thought that popped in me head--thought I'd throw it out!.Www@QuestionHome@Com

It's, in my opinion, alright!.

If you were going for sort of a nostalgic thing (and it looks like you are), I feel like there should be something mentioning the time of the day, maybe with a reference to the light!. I, personally, associate lighting with my childhood, and this seems to be a very childhood-induced poem!.

Otherwise, it's a neat poem!. I don't see any major symbolism here!.!.!.if there is, maybe you should outline it more clearly!. =)Www@QuestionHome@Com

Oh dear cheer,
How wouldn't someone care for such a cheerful smile as yours and for such cosmical yet miniature splendors, chicks like lined into your poem!.
The pome is right to be there for their reach!.
As we are here for you could delight our self!.

Cheers to you, too!Www@QuestionHome@Com

Dear Geko lady:

Methinks you fawning lately
over triassic minis
has a much deeper meaning!.
Maybe the nursing in you!?
Nah, cheap cheap entertainment!Www@QuestionHome@Com

I love those lizards!.!. and would be horribly upset should your Gracie get one!.!. as I know cats very well
They torture the living daylights out of their prey!Www@QuestionHome@Com

even though i didnt really understand it !.!.!.!.it seems interesting can you explain it to me !? spoilednaughtylulu@yahoo!.com =)Www@QuestionHome@Com

Is crazy Gracie chasing a lizard again!? And poor George, all he probably wants to do is take a nap!.Www@QuestionHome@Com

Here leezard, leezard, leezard!.!.!.!.
Oooops!, I theenk I need a beeger box!.!.!.!.!.!.!.Www@QuestionHome@Com

It's weird in an ironic and cool way!. :)Www@QuestionHome@Com