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Question: What do you think of this one
Its very unfinished!. I just wanted to know what everyone thinks of the love comparison to a swamp!. also, the first bit doesn't match, I wonder if I shoul move it to the bottom, or if you have any other suggestions that would be great!.!.!.!. and no "Its too long" I hate those!.!.!.

Life's Great Tragedy

Love
Remains Mysterious!.
A needless emotion
That fuels our needs!.
Life's great tragedy
Beautiful heartbreak!.
Stunning bliss!.
Love
Is a swamp
That resides
In your heart!.
The stagnant water
Stares back into
The depths of your
Soul!.
With a breathless
Moan, you discover
Your true self!.
Wading through
The shadows
Still searching for
Life!.
Vines entrap your vision!.
The aging trunks of trees
Are perpetually moist!.
Odor emits like
Steam from the
The murky depths!.
Love
Is a swamp!.
Heinous havok
Lurks here,
Hidden from your eyes,
Towing behind
Your Imagination!.
Fear
Is almost poetic
Among this
This rancid scene,
Ripped from the
Nightmare fantasy,
Of Dante's Inferno!.
Love
Is dark and deadly!.
An endless forest,
Trapped away,
With Grendel-like
Monsters, capable of
Glowing eyes and razor fangs
Love
Is worth it all!.
Through this miserable
Bog, you will find
The end will never come
You search again for something new
To find only yourself!.
Life
Is worth living,
Because love requires
Growth above this
Horrid Swamp,
Find yourself
Love yourself!.
Love
Ever after, another!.
And together traverse
This wicked warpath!.
Overcome beasts
And fearfull nights
And triumph!.
LifeWww@QuestionHome@Com


Best Answer - Chosen by Asker:
it was spectacular

a little long-i'd say almost too long, but the content was just!.!.!.
stunning
i loved itWww@QuestionHome@Com

WOW, AMAZING

i find it maybe a little bit too long, like some of the lines can be cut but amazing poem!Www@QuestionHome@Com

A very interesting comparison you have, as for the poem I do like it a lot!. However it would be easier to follow and stay on the emotional roller-coaster if you could structure it a little more, e!.g!.

Love remains mysterious!.
A needless emotion, that fuels our needs!.
Life's great tragedy, beautiful heartbreak!.
Stunning bliss!.

This is just a personal observation so feel free to ignore it!.

Keep writing and I hope to one day read the final version of this great poem!.

Best WishesWww@QuestionHome@Com