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Question: Please tell me what you think of this poem (yes it mine and copyrighted)
The Darkened Heart of a Soldier
I have lived a life less untold
Tattered soul and unmendable heart
Left lying here in the darkened place
Blood taints my hands, tears burn my soul
Life is a constant battle with my mind
Watching life drain life given
Not a job for a mean man
Silently hiding my fear
Hiding my pain
Behind these brown eyes is my blackened heart
Am I meant to love
Am I meant to die with all that stain my hands
Am I a child lost in play
Or a man in constant war
Place it behind like nothing happened
Or Hold it in my mind to wear away my person
Thus a man is mearly a killing instrument
For those who pull the strings
Is this the fate of a soldier or a warrior
To watch another man whose strings have been pulled to go glassy eyed
Just for the claim of land and country
or pride and respect
We gain everything from these puppet masters
Nightmares, Fright, Pain, and Sorrow--thus am I a perfect killer now
Blackened Heart, tainted soul and stained hands
These things are meant to be given to another
But I cannot tell if I have them myself
As I am meant to kill--can I truly love
This is a story of a darkened heart soldier
Who will live and die upon a pull of a string
By Casey Donley
? Copyright Casey Donley All Rights Reserved
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Best Answer - Chosen by Asker:
its a poem of sorrow and pain, a soldier that cant find there right path in life any more Www@QuestionHome@Com
I have not real credential, my inspirations are William Blake, Cummings, and Bukowski, to name a few!. So you have a frame of reference on what I like!.
Honestly I couldn't make it through the first few lines!. It just didn't grab me!. In the beginning you are talking about yourself and I am not sure why I should be interested in you!.
Why should I finish this poem!?
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1!. Where is all the punctuation!?
2!. Your poem's rythme is monotonous!. The repetiviness makes this a retard drab!.It is just so slow footed!.
3!. The only real part that I enjoyed was the string master lines!. They were very enlightening!. I never thought about it in that way before!.
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Oh, freddled gruntbuggly!Www@QuestionHome@Com
Its very deep and nice!.!.Good composition!!Really endearing!.!.!.!.can identify with it!.!.thats the best part!Www@QuestionHome@Com
omg i love it
its very touchingWww@QuestionHome@Com
its nice :)Www@QuestionHome@Com
gr8 im feelin it!.!.!. pliz read mine en tell me wat yu thin k too thanksWww@QuestionHome@Com