Taking a leaf out of Hydropro's book. What do you think?

Question: Taking a leaf out of Hydropro's book!. What do you think!?

Rhyming Games

I'm wanting more,
the core revealed
like an apple peeled
(putting skin
in the bin)
exposing the flesh
Guess what I find!?
Left behind
a kind of purity
surety that all
is bright
despite
wind-fall bruises!.
The news is
the forbidden fruit
didn't take root!.
Adam's seed
indeed
is alright!.

(I don't have a clue what all that means - I was just allowing the rhyme to go wherever it wanted) That was fun!. Why don't you have a try!.

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Best Answer - Chosen by Asker:

Very nice for spur of the moment!.!.!. I'll see what I can do off the top of my head!.!.!.

Desire balance leveled
but my outers disheveled
my wrinkled rough skin
heavily burdened by sin
revealing my soul
interrupting my whole
inward to collapse,fold
old age taking hold
obscuring the beauty
mocking me lewdly
slapping me rudely

their eyes lacking vision
making poor decision
never seeing the seed
never feeling the need
they leave me defiled
yet I am Gods child
soon to be vilified
by his mercy and grace
smiles, tears flood my face
for all the seeds planted
not one will he forsake!.Www@QuestionHome@Com

Good Poem!. I am Muslim and we believe in all the Prophets including Adam, so this one is like a chocolate chip cookie to me!.

I will try to decipher ur subconcious meaning!.

1)Despite the tragic history of the forbidden fruit the believers (Adam's offspring) are not too bad off!.

OR/and

2)also, it could mean that despite all you been through in your life, you are pure and optimistic about life!. You look to the light, to the good things!. You are pleased with where you are now, and what you`ve become as a person!.

This is actually a very deep poem!. I love short poems with potent content! This is a very good one!. It has little words and say alot about you!. I'm I right!?!?!?

You revealed your core, you are indeed very bright, and you did an excellent job with this rhyme scheme!.

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The words,
surety,
understanding,
demaning nothing,
flow easy,
go with it,
not my style
while I admire
what can
transpire
among the pens
of others!.

Great work, Granny, loved this one, not only the style but the message that though we are flawed, we are still human, still strong, still beautiful!.Www@QuestionHome@Com

G!. Jill,

Love this one!. It has a really fun rhythm!. I like how it moves from one like image to another!.!.!.core of an apple, to skin of an apple, to flesh!.

I would have commented earlier but I've been in Sonnet hell!.!.!.it's like real Hell I imagine only it includes a heroic couplet!.Www@QuestionHome@Com

You and your rhyming! lol A nice offering Might want to rid yourself of some words like 'kind of' 'wind-fall' 'the'!. But could be me in how I read!.
Here is my answer, do you hear!? lol

Rhyme time… hear!?
Free verse fears
Words flow
Really glow
When beats
Sound neat
Rhyme time…here!
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Have you been vaccuuming again!?

Now if you really want appealing poetry and layers of meaning!.!.!.!.!.try onions!. It's enough to make you wanna cry!

You are a natural rhymer Gran!. All you rhymes will flow natrurally!.

PS Good to see you disposed of the skin thoughtfully!. Www@QuestionHome@Com

These sorts of poems are very fun and you've created a very nice one!. Sometimes just going where the words take you pays off just as this one has!. There is a distinct flow and continuity of thought within the rhyme and these short lines!. Well done!.Www@QuestionHome@Com

As I gleen
in between I see
What you mean
this reading between the line
supine tends to entwine the mind
bends to define the time when
I was cared for and shared more and fared
so much better because of you!.!.!.

How'd I do!?Www@QuestionHome@Com

I Think you are Wonderful in your zest for Life,
and your words are really very nice!.

Unfortunately,
Quite Plain to see,
Hydro is the one for me!

lol!Www@QuestionHome@Com

It gave me a big smile, and now my boss is worried that he has a hole in his pants or that his fly is open!. I wouldn't tell him why I was smiling!.Www@QuestionHome@Com

Your poem delicately unpeeled,
and your message is revealed!.
More than the tiny seeds,
where curiosity intercedes!.Www@QuestionHome@Com

All poetry comes from the brain, often from the subconscious!. The poem has meaning, even if you don't see it!.Www@QuestionHome@Com

I love this kind of musing and letting the words go, all sorts of stuff comes to light!. This is rather good actually!. :-)Www@QuestionHome@Com

I started to look up 'punty' then realized my glasses were on my head!.!.!.Oh, 'purity'!.!.!.now I like it!.Www@QuestionHome@Com

Neat!
So, what!? You just start with an initial thought and let it roll!?Www@QuestionHome@Com

Wonderful, flows from the deepest part! And lots of meaning!.!.!.Www@QuestionHome@Com