This is a poem that i wrote when my life started to go on the rocks please tell

Question: This is a poem that i wrote when my life started to go on the rocks please tell me what you think of it!.!?

as i looked out the window smelling the roses of happyness that could not be mine!.

i fell asleep dreaming of a world that happyness wasn't entwind

but as i woke and the real world took its grasp

i thought of happyness that would always always lastWww@QuestionHome@Com

Best Answer - Chosen by Asker:

It's a nice start, let the saga continue!!!Www@QuestionHome@Com

that sucked balls!!!!!! nobody in their right mind would like that retarded poemWww@QuestionHome@Com

i like it but it would be nice a little longer
xWww@QuestionHome@Com