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Question: Poem open for critique!?
(start it form the bottom)
I am the one, who dares to show true words and make them my own, living echo!.
Still unborn, I celebrate every line painting pictures as clear as a photo, for
Still I grow, I just grow and celebrate every metaphor whether born or
A cyber sheet finite!.!.!.to make you come for more every night!.
To fight left upon a paper with delight then left upon
Of not "YOURS", but "MINE", my heavy sign of will
Heavy sign of amazing, unique growth, my heavy sign
Keyboard, my heavy sign of golden youth, my
Palms leaving my heavy sign on the
With the hurrying movements of my
Words then a thousand more
And write a thousand
I just grow,
I grow
StillWww@QuestionHome@Com
Best Answer - Chosen by Asker:
Interesting concept!.
However, I feel like your more concered with making the lines fit the pattern than creating a reflection of something!. I only say this because I don't quite get a feeling from the poem, it's nicely written and executed but I feel like somethings missing!. (That may be because I don't know you or why you wrote the poem)
What could be interesting to do is make it read both backwards and forwards, but have the story something different each way!. It's challenging, but fun!.
Good luck =]Www@QuestionHome@Com
Dora, I've read so many of your poems!. What an emotional journey!!! You've taken me through rage, longing, desire, sensuality, hatred, love (for others and for self) determination, laughter!.!.!.!. and a relenting sense of self!!!
This speaks to the person that you are!.!.!. I love it!.!.!. it is to me, your best yet!.
TemariWww@QuestionHome@Com
Really not too bad!. Only a poet will understand another poet's wordsWww@QuestionHome@Com