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Position:Home>Poetry> Do you like my poem? How do you think I can improve it? Its a love poem.?Question: Do you like my poem!? How do you think I can improve it!? Its a love poem!.!? immeasurable!.
" Turn this into a story of selfless grace, and generousity!. Even the sky can not reach out to touch the fragile minds of our love!. Crystals envy your heart, pure, and white!. You, are my love!. Minds mend, in a twisting galaxy!. We are agreeable, fitting, immeasurable!. Infinity, will never amount!. "Www@QuestionHome@Com Best Answer - Chosen by Asker: your use of words is fantastic but there isn't a definition to it!. I don't think it is fully understandable how you feel about love, but don't change anything about it!. Just add a few things to make it a bit clearer!. you've just used beautiful descriptions and metaphors instead of creating an actual poem!.Www@QuestionHome@Com well, do it line by line instead of all clumped up into one!. it appears more like a paragraph then a poem the way you have it and its hard to tell where the pauses are supposed to be!. put the commas in the correct places, commas in poems are supposed to show where the pauses go, so (in a poem) they dont necessarily have to be in the gramatically correct places!. other then that its really nice, i like the figurative descriptions!.Www@QuestionHome@Com to be very honest !.!.!.you don't have to improve it!.!.!.!.you are not writing it cause you know English!.!.!. you are writing it cause you love someone!.!.!.if you are asking for improvements then you are insulting that feeling!.!.!. write anything what your heart tells you !.!.!.!.!. i wish i could write something like that T_T!.!.!.!.POOR PRINCE!! its a masterpiece!.!.!.carry on the good work ^_^; Chao!!Www@QuestionHome@Com it has a good start, but the sky doesn't reach, maybe your fragile minds can not reach the sky!? Crystal can not envy, you should work on that, change a few things not all of it, could sound really nice and it should be longerWww@QuestionHome@Com that's kind of cool!. i really like it a lot i'd say how it is right now!. i don't know how to improve itWww@QuestionHome@Com That's a beautiful poem!. I love the descriptive words and the metaphors!.Www@QuestionHome@Com AWESOME IS NOT THE WORD TO DESCRIBE WHAT YOU WROTE!. TOO GOOD!.KEEP IT UP!. Do post some more!. tksWww@QuestionHome@Com I think its truly perfect!.!.!.!. dont change a thing!.Www@QuestionHome@Com your poem is good 10/10 !!Www@QuestionHome@Com that's really good!. you should be a poet!. excelent!. i give you 11 out of 10!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!Www@QuestionHome@Com |