Poem i made......?

Question: Poem i made!.!.!.!.!.!.!?

I put on this dress
But my hair is a mess
I go to the dance
Wanting the time of my life
I sit in the corner, watching the clock tic by
He is dancing with her
I know I hate him now for sure
Why don't I just talk to him!?
Why can't I breathe!?
Here he comes, is he going to stand next to me!?
Then it turns out he just came for the Punch
this knot in my stomach, is making me crunch down
He won't leave my mind!. I've wanted him for a year
Why can't this shyness get the out of me
What is my fear!?
I sit here now, It's the end of the school year yet again!.
These two years went fast
I've wasted my love for him
He should be past;
We got so close and I almost had him
Then we floated apart
I can't let this be three years now
So no it happens to be
He's calling me! He's calling me!

But I don't answer!.
I'm tired of wasting my time!.Www@QuestionHome@Com

Best Answer - Chosen by Asker:

You last couplet is magnificent!

You've captured the essence of all girls (and women) who have had dreams broken by chance and circumstance!.

Well done!.Www@QuestionHome@Com

this is very good!.!.!.!.it kinda describes me cause i like this guy but im too shy to talk to him and i know that i will be waiting for him until he has the guts too ask me or atleast talk to me!.!.!.*thinks* lol thanks i think that you have persuaded me to change that!.!.!.!.thnx again!.!.!.you are very talented and you describe what probbaly every girl have been through!.!.!.Www@QuestionHome@Com

i LOVE it!. it captures what all girls feel at least once in their lives, when the guy they like doesn't know how they feel, and go about their own lives, and the girls want nothing more than to approach them, and admit the crazy, cooped-up feelings that are filling their heads!.

fantastic, keep it up!. i definitely want to hear more from you!.Www@QuestionHome@Com

Awwe!.!.!.
I'd like to talk to you more

I get so angry everytime!.!.!.
The guy I like!.!.!.
Oh well!.!.!.
It's so lovely, you are representing all girls who don't like to get USED!.
Like me, haha!Www@QuestionHome@Com

it super and crazyWww@QuestionHome@Com

Ah, high school angst!. I've often wandered what would have happened if I had just spoken back then!. Very well versed!.Www@QuestionHome@Com

Your last couplet is wow!.!.!.but yo say too much, try transplanting this into continuous prose, id like to see thatWww@QuestionHome@Com

wow thats crazyWww@QuestionHome@Com

I assume soWww@QuestionHome@Com

Wow!!!!.!.!.!.its pretty good!.!.!.!.
i like it!.!.!.!.

there are a few minor points that if you wish you could consider!.!.!.but let me tell you,your poem is really good even without the changes that i m gonna suggest!. so it won't matter much if you don't change!.!.!.

these lines
"What is my fear!?
I sit here now, It's the end of the school year yet again!."

you could make them rhyme a bit by writing it this way!.!.!.!.

"What is my fear!?
That now I sit here
and yet again its the end of another school year!."

it won't change any meaning!.!.!.!.!.anyway its your poem and its good as it is!.!.!.!.

good luck for your future!.!.!. :)Www@QuestionHome@Com

DAYUUMMMMMMM I freakin love this lol amazing omg wow!.!. I love the ending when you say I sit here now, It's the end of the school year yet again!.
These two years went fast
I've wasted my love for him
He should be past;
We got so close and I almost had him
Then we floated apart
I can't let this be three years now
So no it happens to be
He's calling me! He's calling me!

But I don't answer!.
I'm tired of wasting my time!.

love that

omg I love your poem omg wowWww@QuestionHome@Com