Love
arises dawns
of sweet awakeings,
Anonymous, hidden blissful feelings
that come to soul's open heart's
awaiting, a reason of birth
-------------a reason of death!.Www@QuestionHome@Com
| Question Home |
Position:Home>Poetry> Just a poem, comments please?Question: Just a poem, comments please!? Love
arises dawns of sweet awakeings, Anonymous, hidden blissful feelings that come to soul's open heart's awaiting, a reason of birth -------------a reason of death!.Www@QuestionHome@Com Best Answer - Chosen by Asker: I like the poem!. A suggestion: "a reason FOR rather than "of "birth/death!?"Www@QuestionHome@Com i remember back when i was at school and doing poetry, what is the name of that structure!.!.!.its on the tip of my tounge!. Are you looking for a word in the ------- space!? If so you could go for something twisted like seeking, or you could go sweet like dreading [keeping with the whole lovey thing of love never dies] sounds great though!Www@QuestionHome@Com This is great!. I like Elaine's suggestion of changing "of" to "for" but it is your work and lovely as is, as well! Good job!Www@QuestionHome@Com Arises is an interesting word choice when one would normally say raises!.!.!.but it works well!. Nice!. Simple in message the last line gives a finality!. I like!.Www@QuestionHome@Com A lovely poem of the vertues and hazzards of love!. A lot said with but few words!.Www@QuestionHome@Com omg awesum! i love how u made the lines run on!!! lik how u r in the middle of sentence but u start a new line!.!.!.it creates an awesum effect!!! i think its great nd very deep!.!.!.sweet nd twisted!.!.!. :DWww@QuestionHome@Com i like itWww@QuestionHome@Com I really enjoyed this!. Short and sweet yet meaningful!.Www@QuestionHome@Com =] i like it , i like it alot very goowd ! keep it up buddie =] lolWww@QuestionHome@Com Nice - keep writing!. I can see you going places!.Www@QuestionHome@Com |