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Question: For people with experience in Poems, Is this a good poem!?
THE AWAKENED SOUL by S!.Rodriguez

Against all odds I stood to face

All of the demons that burrowed deep,

At night when the moon stood high,

It was the soul of the ocean that did not sleep!.

She took my hand and led me to the waters,

And dared me to take a chance,

All at once her movement sung to me,

And my spirit began to dance!.

Winds encircled my presence,

Embracing all I am,

Becoming one with the shadows,

Building dreams from sand!.

Immense understanding,

Life in an instant is both cloudy and clear;

It is but a gamble-

To submerge and surrender without fear!.Www@QuestionHome@Com


Best Answer - Chosen by Asker:
Beautiful!.!.

Sounds like you may have experience with poetry :-0

"to submerge and surrender without fear" Love this verse!.

I love poems where many interpretations can be read from each line!. It is imaginative and that is how i write some of my poetry!. Very good!Www@QuestionHome@Com

It rhymes! Poems that rhyme come from the head and not the heart!. The first initial sentence comes from the heart and then your head/ brain starts to go through the alphabet looking for a rhyming word!. Example- All of the demons that burrowed deep!. Then your brain says meek, leak, keep, sleep, and you chose one that fits the best!. Although it may be a very good poem with good meaning it isn't from the heart and soul!. Soul poems only come around when they want to!. When you come across one you will know because your pen will be going 100mph without even thinking!Www@QuestionHome@Com

There is no rhythm, no poetry!. the rhyming is forced and it does not flow!.
Still a lot better than most!.

I fear that some contributors
read the poems with deaf ears
and they cannot as we can hear
the words as would be read out there!.

Ideas of poetry and meter
they doth defeat, the slow reader
and so the Rhythm and the Rhyme
defeat the Musically blind

Music writing is my thing
Around the tune Lyrics I fling
And provided that they Rhyme
anything will do!.Www@QuestionHome@Com

That just left me speachless!. It was really good!. You shouldn't change it at all!. You used such strong language and word choice!. I loved it!. I especially like the part about the moon being the soul of the ocean, that never slept!. That was wowing!Www@QuestionHome@Com

nah I dont think so!.!.!. I think poems can rhyme and still come from the heart!.!.!. I love when poems rhyme because there much easier to readWww@QuestionHome@Com

hey, is she a mermaid!. i like it!.Www@QuestionHome@Com

I love it!.Www@QuestionHome@Com