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Position:Home>Poetry> Tears are fallin...Is my poem any good?Question: Tears are fallin!.!.!.Is my poem any good!? I did this one a while ago just tell me what you think of it!.!.!.
Tears Are Fallin Love and hate and suicide All things lost I cannot hide Ive seen the light Ive felt the heat All things lost I cant compete All things lost I admit defeat Now the tears run down my face Thats just one more line I cant eraseWww@QuestionHome@Com Best Answer - Chosen by Asker: I like it!. For better syntax, you might consider "I fear defeat" or some other one syllable word, instead of "admit"!. also, the last line would be better without the word "That's!." Maybe you could say, "Another line I can't erase!." Don't worry about it being too simple!. The important thing in poetry is getting the message across in a creative way!.Www@QuestionHome@Com It would be good as a song but not as a poem!. It's too emo and simple for a poem!. also, "seen the light", "felt the heat" "all things lost" and "admit defeat" are pretty cliched and overused!. also, poems don't have to rhyme, they just have to be rhythmic like music, which this does pretty well!.Www@QuestionHome@Com Okay, who said it didn't rhyme ("rime")!? Poems do not have to rhyme so take no advice from anyone who complains that your poetry does not rhyme!. This is acutally nice because it is short and gets the point across without bogging down!. But it's too full of teen angst!. All is never lost unless you are Napoleon Bonaparte!. So quit feeling sorry for yourself and put something in your poem about how your are going to get through this!. Only two poets ever got any recognition for being so morbid, and they aren't terribly popular anymore!.Www@QuestionHome@Com I scarcely come across male poets on yahoo!. When I do, they are normally emo, or make attempts to collect a bunch of poet loving females to e-mail!. You on the other hand, don't voice those intentions in your poetry, thus far!. Anyways, to your poem!. I think this poem is intense, and borders dark emo poetry, but other than that is just a great poem!. Your rhyming is elementary!. This being said, know that everything we learn how to do better (like writing) has to come from the bottom steps up!. I understand the message in this poem!. I can relate to some of those downcast feelings!. If you are an adult writer, I give this poem a Basic 6!.7/10 If$ you're younger your points would go up, depending on your expected level of writing for whatever age group you are in!. Keep at it!. I hope to read more of your work!.Www@QuestionHome@Com I think its great =] Personally I think it grabs the reader and you can feel the emotion in it even though its not like long and detailed poem!. I love it!.Www@QuestionHome@Com Good poem!. keep writing and the emotions will not become overwhelming!. great job!.Www@QuestionHome@Com that's good!. it rhymes and is honest!. good poem!.Www@QuestionHome@Com not a poem it does not even rimeWww@QuestionHome@Com i like this a lot!. its real deepWww@QuestionHome@Com |