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Question: Poem critique: Until I die!?
is she ready to go, and help me change me!?
is she ready to know, the hell that claims me!?
is she ready to hide, the light that blinds me!?
unto her i confide, the lies that bind me
but things dont feel same
so i let the bullets rain
until i die

im sitting here by myself, slowly trying
contemplating my health, softly dying
can i sit on the roof, and cry my eyes out!?
atop the crown of the runes, that watch like a night owl
but things dont feel same
so i let the bullets rain
until i die

she wont let me cry
she dont want me to die
she comes with me to hide
in her bosom is where my head lies
tears settle on her thighs
then her heart opens wide
she let's me see her fears
then everything is made clear
i am ready to go
i feel no need for another soul
i feel content alone
so i leave her to moan
and ululate the rights to my heart
i have torn her world apartWww@QuestionHome@Com


Best Answer - Chosen by Asker:
i cried!.Www@QuestionHome@Com

wow, it was really good!.Www@QuestionHome@Com