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Question: Tick Tock!.!.!. Another poem by me!?
Tick Tock
Time is slowly ticking away,
I have so much to want say,
Time is running and no longer in silence I can stay!.
My heart turns to rock,
Every time I hear the ticking clock
I curse cupid and I want to stuff in its mouth a dirty old sock!.
Help I think I’m going insane,
I just don’t know if I’m screaming in vain,
But I refuse to close my heart and forever cry in pain!.
My lips burn for your kiss,
I want to embrace you in an eternal bliss
You’ll be my sun and I’ll be your moon,
Together we’ll fly away like the gentle breeze in summer June!.Www@QuestionHome@Com
Best Answer - Chosen by Asker:
It's lacking something!. Try to rewrite it and be more patient!. Even if it takes you weeks, months or years to write it!. It all depends on how bad you want to make it a good poem!. But, there will be a certain point, and you will know it, when the poem has become as good as it's going to get!. Don't give up and don't be afraid to write something your readers might not understand!Www@QuestionHome@Com
This is very creative!. I think you could trim it a little, to make the meter clear!. It is nice work!. TDWww@QuestionHome@Com
Woah! Man, that's awesome!. I love to hear more!. You Should post more on YAhoo answers!.
??Www@QuestionHome@Com
This poem is written on the pang of love !.
The rhyme and rhythm of the poem are kept quite clear!. This increases the music and the lyric ; turning it partly into a song of Love!.
Here the poetess is in extreme mental despair, because she is away from her beloved!.
In the first para, she feels how the wheel of time is ticking slowly and she now nomore can remain silent, feeling a tremendous void!.
In the next she turns to Cupid, who according to her is responsible for this separation in time and space!.
In the third she begs for this sad plight to be removed, she feels she is going to go insane, but at the same time a strength in her refuses to give in and cry helplessly!.
In the fourth she speaks of the supreme consummation between two lovers, - kiss, embrace,eternal bliss, union of the sun with the moon!.
Together, they would fly away like the cool breeze in summer!.
This passion and the pain is felt by every lover!.
When in love ; every lover feels at some stage this pang, this pain, this separation, and everntually the joy of Union!.
i have relished this poem like the drink of Sharabate Azm!.Www@QuestionHome@Com