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Question: A rough draft, what do you think!?
Parasitic Pain
Parasites infest my brain,
biteing, chewing, burrowing,
the noises that they make,
it's driveing me insane!.
A constant buzz is in my ears,
while they chew away my memories,
leaving me with just the bad,
An ever present fear!.
These microscopic creatures,
they control my every thought,
all i can think of is them,
and all they do is torture!.
I am down on my knees,
with my head in my hands,
God, Please make it stop,
just show me a little mercy!
Death would be relief,
but they won't let me die,
they want to see me writh in pain,
A state i'll never leave!.Www@QuestionHome@Com
Best Answer - Chosen by Asker:
A very unique poem!. It kind of reminds me of earwigs!. Eating away your brain!. Very nice!. Keep it up and remember!.!.!.I care!.
Edit: Don't worry about the syllables and structure, you are writing free verse!. Some people just should not answer at all if they don't understand what the writer is doing!.Www@QuestionHome@Com
Its a good poem but i notice in the first stanza the first and fourth lines rhymed but in every other stanza they didnt!. Its very good though, interesting!.Www@QuestionHome@Com
Ooh! I like it! You might want to work on the rythum and syllables though!. Here is a helpful poem writing help site:Www@QuestionHome@Com