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Question: Will she like this!?
a simple rose
She sits back while I describe a rose
its petals soft and lush to the minimalist of touches
The moistness of a stem, thorns all plucked and thrown away
Her sightless eyes watch the ground
lips move in a gentle smile each time I laugh
but she stays quite, always in a waiting for me to continue
and so I do
Careful to never say a word of color
There is never any need to speak of appearances
when she would never comprehend them
But all of you must understand, she doesn’t have to see
To kiss
This is for a very special someone whose name I cannot pronounce! It is bad when one has a lisp and the other cannot see a darn thing!.
Will she like it!? I purposely put words in that I can barely say!. She has always found it funny when I read her poetry but this will be one of the first of my own I have done for her!.Www@QuestionHome@Com
Best Answer - Chosen by Asker:
I do not know her so I can't tell but!.!.!. do you think it wise to mention that she will never know what color is!? Is this something you guys talk about!? If you are fine with it and think it won't be a big deal then go ahead but!.!.!. IDK, it just struck me funny!. Is she really blind!? If she has no problem there then I do not see why she wouldn't like this, it is well written and very pretty!. I would if I was her!.
Edit:
The ending makes up for it though, It sent romantic chills down my spine!Www@QuestionHome@Com
I like it!. I don't see why she won't like it!.Www@QuestionHome@Com
awwwww!. this is a great poem!Www@QuestionHome@Com
yes, it is very nice!. but u spelled "quiet" wrong!. But good job on it!. I think she will like it, :DWww@QuestionHome@Com
Fallen, it's a very good and descriptive poem, but I'm with Siren!. If you are going to write a poem about her then maybe you should write one that describes all the ways she can see instead of the things she can't or the things she'll never comprehend!. She can see with all her other senses such as the smell of your cologne or the scent of your hair!. She can see your face through the touch!. I like how you mentioned that she can hear your laugh!. She doesn't need to see your smile when she can hear it in your laugh!. I just think it would be more romantic if you concentrated on all the things she can do and omit the things she can't!.Www@QuestionHome@Com