A poem.:) hope you like...?

Question: A poem!.:) hope you like!.!.!.!?

i am a closed book
i dont open myself
i am in need of help
but no one bothers to look

i am a thunderstorm
in rage, something has been torn
out of me, inside my heart
it has been pulled apart

i am a hidden shadow
hiding from my surrounding
i dont allow
anyone to see what im doing

*what do you think of it!.!.it was written around january this year:O*
hope ya like!.!.star this topic if ya like:)Www@QuestionHome@Com

Best Answer - Chosen by Asker:

Uhh!.!.!.its OK!.!.!.but that is about all I have to say about it!. I could edit it for you :)

Edited Version:

am a closed book - I am a closed book
i dont open myself - And open, I cannot do
i am in need of help - Seeking help from you
but no one bothers to look - With eyes shut, you cannot look

i am a thunderstorm - I am a Thunderstorm
in rage, something has been torn - Utter rage, now has me torn
out of me, inside my heart - A dark hole, within my heart
it has been pulled apart - Only reveals the pieces and parts

i am a hidden shadow - A hidden shadow
hiding from my surrounding - Blended into my surrounding
i dont allow - I won't allow
anyone to see what im doing - Another to see my doings!.

Just a critique!.!.!.Www@QuestionHome@Com

I like tulips - do you you!?

How's this for a poem

Mary had a little lamb that wouldn't stop grunting
so she tied it to a five-bar gate and kicked it's littl c!.!.!. in!!!Www@QuestionHome@Com

it is a little rockey, but overall i do like it!. you should expand on it, and write more with is!. for om=ne of my poem, i started writing it last year, when it was only a sentance long, now it is like 15 sentences long!. good job and keep writng ^_^

^_^Www@QuestionHome@Com

pain is human
erring is human
those who stand and judge and try to ruin your life
in their old age they will suffer
as all crimes will be paid for-
pain in youth si the worst as you seem
so alone
it will come back to haunt if you don;t deal with it
a frined can help, but they don't come easilyWww@QuestionHome@Com

its ok!.i tink i like it cuz i can relate to the persona!.it is connected with emotions tht are strong and for tht i appreciate its meaning!.!.!.!.yea sjandz, tht was a pretty gud poem :PWww@QuestionHome@Com

It's a little choppy and open your vocabulary!.
Sorry, I'm a bit of a critic!.Www@QuestionHome@Com

I like it!!!!!!!! Scratch that, I LOVE IT!!!!!!!!!!!! Its deep and emotional, but not too deep for people to label you as emo/goth/punk!. Like they say, labels are for soup cans!!Www@QuestionHome@Com

Nice poem, though it does seem at a beginner's level!.!.!.
But that's not a problem!. It is still incredible!.Www@QuestionHome@Com

I think its a great poem, I love poems and i absolutely want to write one when I hear yours good job!Www@QuestionHome@Com

genericWww@QuestionHome@Com

i do!. but geta little more emotionalWww@QuestionHome@Com

The sentiment is fine, but it's a little cliche!.Www@QuestionHome@Com

I think its creativeWww@QuestionHome@Com

wow that like explains me! its all like me!.!.!.!.!.Www@QuestionHome@Com

no, I dont like it!. it's not that good!.Www@QuestionHome@Com

too emo for my taste!.!.!. try to be happy :) !.!.!.!. like this little smile dude!. :)Www@QuestionHome@Com

my least favorite poem on Yahoo Answers!!! 1 out of 10Www@QuestionHome@Com

It's OK!. I kinda like it!!!Www@QuestionHome@Com