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Question: Is this sonnet too soppy!?
Love’s wake up call!. (Sonnet)


When I woke up this morning, all was bright
No hint of Damoclean swords above
Directions to perfection, now in sight
My ears were pricked, the switch was flicked by love!.

For what can darken visions such as mine
Where even Hell itself holds hidden charms
Perception is the Potter’s wavy line
To build and mould and shape you in my arms

A shape not of my choice, but pure and true
The essence of the clay, both you and I
We pirouette as conjoined lovers do
In spirals dancing upwards through the sky

Your smile soothes me to sleep each blessed night
When I woke up this morning, all was bright!.

Danny ReynoldsWww@QuestionHome@Com


Best Answer - Chosen by Asker:
I think you achieved the perfect tone!. This is not soppy at all, just right!.

Might I suggest a little change in the first and last lines to adjust the meter!?

"When I awoke this morning, all was bright" puts the accent on woke rather than up!.

Good job with this one!. Well done!Www@QuestionHome@Com

Not soppy!.
You announced the conflict well, resolution in lines 8-9, then falling action, and peace in the couplet!. Well accorded!
ACK!!
Coffee!!!Www@QuestionHome@Com