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Question: Poem ("March") - Is it any good!?
MARCH
"It is not so cloudy today, and
the wind is north-westerly",
it was march and we climbed
the Hill, you told me you
didn't remember that day
(but I do; still)
I don’t think I ever told you
that I wanted to twist myself
between those deciduous trees;
and I doubt you noticed how my cheeks
flushed as I crawled across the undergrowth,
getting grass-stains on my knees!.
"You were born in march
because no one ever knows
when it will rain!."
(I was born in march because I
am forever stuck between the words
I said to you and the time i really
meant them!.)
I don't think you know how to kiss the
sky when it rains the way that i do;
i think you missed the way I
wrapped my arms around myself
every time the wind whipped at my face;
and I don’t think you know how much
it is taking for me to stay afloat
(every time I told you that I
hated the cold you told me
i needed a better coat)Www@QuestionHome@Com
Best Answer - Chosen by Asker:
A poem should share your feelings while it draws a picture for me to understand!. I think you have done a beautiful job of writing this poem!. It shares your feelings and does a wonderful job of bringing me into the picture!.
The only thing I would suggest changing is deciduous trees!. At that point my mind went back to Botany 101 as I tried to remember what they were!. Perhaps there would be a better way to word that!.
Pastor JohnWww@QuestionHome@Com
this part is the best!. -
and I don’t think you know how much
it is taking for me to stay afloat
(every time I told you that I
hated the cold you told me
i needed a better coat)Www@QuestionHome@Com
!.!.!.The March Hare disaprovesWww@QuestionHome@Com
amazing and amazing!. very good, my dear!.
kudos!Www@QuestionHome@Com
It is very good, as 2 of my 3 kids were born in March!! Poetry doesn't have to rhyme!!!Www@QuestionHome@Com
It's a pretty fair poem with very good wording!.Www@QuestionHome@Com
wow that poem makes me want to be a March babyWww@QuestionHome@Com
it is alright but it doesnt ryhmeWww@QuestionHome@Com
I'm a March baby!
You're very good[=Www@QuestionHome@Com