Position:Home>Poetry> Could you tell me what you think of these poems?(They're short)?
Question: Could you tell me what you think of these poems!?(They're short)!?
Poem 1
A beautiful girl
In a beautiful dress
Standing under a tree
None the less
She’s crying and crying
The tears will never stop
All because
Her dear Prince Charming
Broke her heart
Poem 2
Red is for passion
Yellow, for happiness
They both stand together
Now, watch them fall apart
Poem 3
Clouds,
Red as the fire that burns in a young girls heart
Fire,
Blue as the sky on a sunny day
White,
Blacker than pure darkness
A complete lie
Yet the truth is told
I know it’s hard to understand
Just what I’m talking about
But do not fret
When you’re no longer there
And here with me
I’ll show you
You’ll have eternity to learnWww@QuestionHome@Com
Best Answer - Chosen by Asker:
My dear poet
I was in two minds whether I should comment on your writings, but as you did ask for comments I felt that I should honor your request!.
I tried to get into your mind, to see how the original words began to take shape, and to find out what you wanted to do with them, how you wanted to express them!.
Having come the to conclusion that you are still very young which would account for the way you have expressed yourself!.
I have found that the meaning to all of your poems, what you are saying is quite clear, however, how you have written them is somewhat disappointing!. I think that with more care in setting out you words, putting them in tuneful order so to speak, there is much potential there!.
Poem No!. 2 is a good form of prose, and that one I like!.
Put your thoughts on paper, look at them, rewrite them where needed!. See what needs to be changed and do not be afraid to experiment!. Ask yourself "Is this what I want to say, and is this how I want to say it, if so how will it be received!?"
But having said all of that, perhaps this 77 year old may have lost touch with the youth of today!.
My respects to you!.
RobertWww@QuestionHome@Com
i think that your poems need work on rhythm because when you start, they go really good but somehow the endings don't have the music like the beginning!. But i liked the first stanza of the 3rd poem about your connection with nature and colors, do that more often with other emotions!.Www@QuestionHome@Com
cool poem!.!.^-^ I really like them all eventhough they do not ryhme much but yet I love them!.!.!.^-^ Its a freat poem and My fave!.!.!.!.I guess it would have to be!.!.!.hmmm!.!.!.!.!.aww I can't choose between them cuz they are really good!.!.!.!.but!.!.!.!.!.I have to say that I like poem #1 a lil bit more than the rest!.!.!.!.!.!.cuz I have been there and done that!.!.!.and!.!.!.!.!.I can understand it very well!.!.!.!.
PS
Ur a great poet so keep on writing!!! =3
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(?!.·′ (?!.·′ * Miyuki*Www@QuestionHome@Com
I like them quite a bit, I know a lot of people say poems have to have rhythm or they need to rhyme but that's not what a true poem is!. A poem is something that comes from within whether it be evil, love, or something extreme!. Keep writing!.Www@QuestionHome@Com
These are really good poems!. a lot better than I can write!. continue your writing and expand your horizons !.Www@QuestionHome@Com
the first 2 were awesome but the last one's begining made no sense watsoeverWww@QuestionHome@Com
I like the third one!. :0
The others are okay, just!.!.!. short, lol!. I'm not saying they're bad, but yeah!.Www@QuestionHome@Com
I like them, there goodWww@QuestionHome@Com
i like the second and the thirdWww@QuestionHome@Com