Critique My Poem: You Stole My Soul?

Question: Critique My Poem: You Stole My Soul!?

You Stole My Soul

Please bring it back

You are nice and sweet

I need my soul back

Your touch is tender

Hand me my soul back

Your eyes have spark

Can I have my soul back!?

It is all over and you have my soul

And now I am in love with youWww@QuestionHome@Com

Best Answer - Chosen by Asker:

I think your Comedic Syntax i amazingly deep!.!.!.!. I thought that it was the most intellegent and comedic thing I hav ever read!.!.!. I commend you!!Www@QuestionHome@Com

I understand the purpose of all but one line, that being "You are nice and sweet!." For me, it doesn't seem to resonate well with the rest of the poem, which is actually cute and somewhat deceptive in that you think you're going to be immersed in some emo mire, but instead you're pleasantly surprised by a declaration of love!. Nice work!.Www@QuestionHome@Com

it's beautiful!. only thing that i have a problem with is "you are nice and sweet" i think you could come up with something a little better than that!. i love you poem though!. if you can do this beautiful a job at first, then with this revision!.!.!.your poem will be heavenly!. lovely!. =]SarahWww@QuestionHome@Com

Not awful, but it's not great!. I'd give it a 5 on a scale of 10!.

It's too repetitive for my tastes and hasn't enough meatiness to it to work!. In other words, it's not developed enough to sustain the repeated use of the word 'back'!.

!.Www@QuestionHome@Com

i really like this!. its a great poem!. its like the literature i loke to read!. stuff that is deep and like depressing to a point!.
still great job!. i enjoyed reading it!.Www@QuestionHome@Com

its a pretty poemWww@QuestionHome@Com