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Question: Do you like my acrostic poem!?
Under Martian skies
Never far from thoughts of you,
Trying hard not to despair,
I write my poems and sing my songs
Hearing the echoes of your voice!.
Why are you not with me, though
Ever in my mind and heart!?
My soul longs for your embrace;
Early in the Martian morn,
Even then I dream of Earth,
Trying still to hold you close!.
Away, with you, sad thoughts of death!
Give me back the lust for life,
And I promise, more soon than late,
In the hands of the Eternal One
Never again will we be parted!.Www@QuestionHome@Com
Best Answer - Chosen by Asker:
The verse that you write from your soul to the pen,
Will tell all us readers of how you were then!.
Someone you loved deeply has gone far away,
To meet you on Mars on some far future day!.
For in the words that you write and I read,
Is the soul of the one for which you now plead!.Www@QuestionHome@Com
Very good except untih isn't a word!.!.!.!.lol
Maybe!.!.!.!.
Listening to the echoes of your voice!.
Nice work:)Www@QuestionHome@Com
Hmm!?
I do like it, but I can't quite say why!. It is good but I think it crosses over itself and mixes up the images!. It is lovely though and got me thinking about what a Martian morning might be like and in terms of being far away from a loved one I could really identify with that!. I travel a lot for work!.
so a definate 9/10!.
The only bit I really don't like is the line that talks of death, too morbid for such a lovely poem belongs in Romeo and Juliette version!.Www@QuestionHome@Com
i like itWww@QuestionHome@Com
This is a beautiful poem Elaine!. Love, pain, loss - I understand and feel your poem!. The acrostic phrase consummates it all!. Well done!.Www@QuestionHome@Com
Very interesting Elaine P!. It`s seems to me that you are missing someone!. You will see them again,I promise!.Www@QuestionHome@Com
Are you listening to me or just hearing me!? lol A built in critique that you caught before us! You need to work on giving us something to say besides, great, wonderful, superlative, tremendous, wonderful, etc!. Got it!?
Aside, a very enjoyable read, thanks for being Martian in all things good!Www@QuestionHome@Com
I more than 'like it' I Love it Elaine!
Not only a beautiful tribute, but very well written in my humble opinion!.Www@QuestionHome@Com
This is a beautiful acrostic!. While it is often a discredited poetic form, I do believe that we can give so much more through it to others!. Maybe not poets as a whole, but definitely to the ones we love!. I am sorry for your loss, and as trite as the words sound, they are true!. The Answers community is just that, a community, and while the ability to share grief to others anonymitous eyes makes it easier, it doesn't make the pain any less real!. You have my sympathy and my prayers!.Www@QuestionHome@Com
This blends the now with the past, in the rhythm and the phrasing and presents a melancholy picture!.
It is so clever, too!. If you had not pointed out to me that it was an acrostic, I wouldn't have noticed (I don't think that would be anything to do with the missing L) - you set yourself a hard task and are determined to master it, and you do!.
One line - And I promise would 'sooner or later' be better!? I know that this phrase isn't world shatteringly different but
because 'later' has two syllables, it sits better with the echoing word 'parted'Www@QuestionHome@Com
This is beautiful Martian yearnings!. I will be finished with Glenn's book in a couple weeks!. We will all do some talking then!. TDWww@QuestionHome@Com