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Question: Will you comment on my Quatern!?
Inspired by Sptfyr and the mothers crying for their children in this time of war, I have written my first Quatern!.
Golden Domes
On frigid Martian desert sands
Golden domes form a perfect ring
Around the great communal dome
Where poets meet and share their songs!.
We write our words and speak of Earth
On frigid Martian desert sands;
No hatred, poverty or war
In poems filled with hope and love!.
Phobus and Deimos circle near,
The days are long and there is time
On frigid Martian desert sands
To write, to think, to dream, to sing!.
No poppies grow on our new soil,
No mothers feel despair and pain,
Our minds are free to think and write
On frigid Martian desert sands!.Www@QuestionHome@Com
Best Answer - Chosen by Asker:
It's wonderful, Elaine!. Absolutely beautiful and full of love, hope and peace!. Your quatern explains the confusion between the example and the directions within my source!. My poem "Musing" may not be a quatern at all which means I will have to try again and this time you shall be my inspiration :) I wonder what form it is that I used!. I think I'll post it again and see if anyone recognizes the structure!.
I'm going to add your source to mine so I can compare the guidelines!.Www@QuestionHome@Com
Really good poem =] =]Www@QuestionHome@Com
it's very lovely!.
even though i have no idea what a quatern is, i think u wrote a great one!
:DWww@QuestionHome@Com
Forget about being inspired by Sptfyr or someone else; since you are proving yourself as an able poet of substance using quatern (or quatrain) division of the poetic meter!. This stricter form is so near to petrachen sonnet in English literature, and no wonder you have commendable hold of the rhyme scheme too!. Though the sonnet is usually refelcts as poem of fourteen lines, with a fixed rhyme scheme, yet these sixteen lines poem of yours represents an echo of those children in your mind in war torn zone!.
Excellent!.Www@QuestionHome@Com
I am not a technical expert!. However, I read the description of a quatern, and you've nailed it on the head perfectly!. In addition, the poetic material is thoughtful and hopeful!. It is a satisfying and enjoyable read!.Www@QuestionHome@Com
good 1Www@QuestionHome@Com
Good Elaine P, and you spelled it right!.Www@QuestionHome@Com
Perfect!.!.!.!.!.I know how difficult it is to take a single line, and make it slot into the following verses and still make a comprehensible poem!. And you have done it!. (I am not going to count your syllables a) because I know you take great care in this and b) I hear that each line is perfect!.
The last verse is very moving, conjuring up the poppies on Flanders Fields (representing all the fallen) and the wonderful world you envisage where they would not exist!.Www@QuestionHome@Com
I am getting the feeling that I must visit Mars someday!. Lol!. A wonderful rendition of a quatern and a great ending!.Www@QuestionHome@Com
Excellent and very thoughtful of you!.Www@QuestionHome@Com
I love this form!. It is beautiful to read and it has great rhythm!.Www@QuestionHome@Com
This is perfect!. I am working on all the new books this week!. (Glenn first)!. We will have things to talk about soon!.!.!.Www@QuestionHome@Com