Please i need a brutally honest opinion?

Question:i found out two days ago
that your the reason
i could never see
i wish i can't see you

im sorry i have to ask you to go
im not sorry for what you did
i wont apologise to you
i wont hold it back
but i am sorry i have to ask you to go

i know your my blood
but you're not my love
and remeber
i won't see you again

they asked me to write a letter
so this is it for you
i dont want to talk to you again
i can forgive you
but i dont want to see you

i know your my blood
but you're not my love
and remeber
i won't see you again

i won't see you again
i can't see you again
please don't call
please don't write
this letter is hard enough

the world can't hold
a letter of such weight
so i may just throw it away
but ill still keep the words
i know your my blood
but you're not my love
and remeber
i won't see you again
but because i'm weak i just might

Best Answer - Chosen by Asker: i found out two days ago
that your the reason
i could never see
i wish i can't see you

im sorry i have to ask you to go
im not sorry for what you did
i wont apologise to you
i wont hold it back
but i am sorry i have to ask you to go

i know your my blood
but you're not my love
and remeber
i won't see you again

they asked me to write a letter
so this is it for you
i dont want to talk to you again
i can forgive you
but i dont want to see you

i know your my blood
but you're not my love
and remeber
i won't see you again

i won't see you again
i can't see you again
please don't call
please don't write
this letter is hard enough

the world can't hold
a letter of such weight
so i may just throw it away
but ill still keep the words
i know your my blood
but you're not my love
and remeber
i won't see you again
but because i'm weak i just might

well u asked for an honest opinion & here it is.... the meaning is great but there is not literary devices to enhance ur poem like metaphor, simile, imagery, just to name a few. there i also hv 2 say very little structure but the main phrase "i know ur my....whatevr" u can still keep it, just put more of tht emotion u hold back in it. '_^

its very sad. its a deep poem

awwww thats so sad but it was a good poem .

brutally honest?
well, it's kind of boring and sounds like something an immature 12 year old would write.
there isn't much depth, your just repeating the same mediocre words again.

In between O.K. and good.

where 1 is DIE and 10 is Marry Me...

I'd give you a 7.5

tht is DEEP like 1,000,000 ft. deep, u have a talent and u need to c if sum 1 will publish tht, i am in tears as i writs this

lots of mispellings, no flow, doesn't really make sense

its was okay but keep up

Don't give up your day job!

Edit: You did ask us to be brutally honest, but some troll gave me a thumbs down? Go figure!

Good written poem! i think personally that might also b a good song! so think about that! luv ya!

What livsterxx said.

Oh, dear, I just read one, analized it for some poetry students and I can not remember who wrote it. It was a well known poet and the premise was the same. Perhaps not so openly but the possibility was exposed and the almost seed of hope was there so the door was left ajar. I like it very much , it rings true and it feels human. good work.

"Me Thinks Thou Dost Protest Too Much" . Shakespeare knew what he was doing. and so did you

remeber should be remember and it has a good starting idea but it could use some work. Not that it's bad it just needs some tweaking. Read, read, read poetry from other poets who have been published so you can get an idea about how to write and I picked up a teacher's poetry book from a book store to help me write my poems so that might help.