..........Broken ?

Question:A year or two went by,
You made some promises...
But you did not keep them.
You said that I was your only girl...
As time passed and life's journey continued
My heart aches for you,
I long for you to be by my side...
She came between us and never again will we share the laughter we once shared...
She doesn't treat you with kindness...
Does she really love you?

Best Answer - Chosen by Asker: A year or two went by,
You made some promises...
But you did not keep them.
You said that I was your only girl...
As time passed and life's journey continued
My heart aches for you,
I long for you to be by my side...
She came between us and never again will we share the laughter we once shared...
She doesn't treat you with kindness...
Does she really love you?

I think it's a great poem.
One thing though- where you write:
"As time passed and life's journey continued
my heart aches for you.."
the first part is past tense and the second is current, so it might sound better to say:
"As time passes and lifes journey continues
my heart aches for you.."
or:
"Time passed and now as lifes journey continues
my heart aches for you"

makes me think very fleetwood mac stevie nicks you know? i like it tho......

Plumeriagirl,
It is good but there is one thing that I would change and that is you start out writing in the past tense and then you go to present tense. Other than that it is great!