Poem critique 2?

Question:Can you give me ideas for improvement on this one? It's incomplete.

Stranger Who Sits Alone

Scars.
Mark my body,
and my mind.
Tragedies and losses,
and deaths, and negligence.
Each scar a reminder of the malice,
of years passed.
You grow used to these pains.
Just like the hard tissue of my scars.
Just like my hardened heart.

Best Answer - Chosen by Asker: Can you give me ideas for improvement on this one? It's incomplete.

Stranger Who Sits Alone

Scars.
Mark my body,
and my mind.
Tragedies and losses,
and deaths, and negligence.
Each scar a reminder of the malice,
of years passed.
You grow used to these pains.
Just like the hard tissue of my scars.
Just like my hardened heart.

its a good attempt.
you could make it flow better,
u should just write down all feelings related to sadness death etc..in brainstorm form and then blend into a full poem.

random...

Thanks for picking up your magical pen,
turning it into a brush,
introducing it to your colorful emotions,
and eventually painting the start of an amzing poem.

The poem leaves me drowning in its tidepool,
shading me with sadness and sorrow,
and eventually spinning me around the gloomy thoughts of my emotions.
!

its okay.. not sure what to say. it does not flow well is the first thing i noticed. i understand the feeling in the poem (maybe a little too well) but if you are happy with it the way it is then thats all that matters.

It's incomplete, child, because there is nothing here. Your heart is not hard, your scars are not real. If they were, you would not dream of saying so in such a belittling fashion. Throw it out.

Give us more. What tragedies, what losses, whose death (loved one, friend, etc.), what negligence? You don't have to be too specific, just less vague. Once you show us these we will see why the "your's" heart is hardened.