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Question: How to stop being selfish!?
So I recently drew a picture I was proud of, and ended up showing it to about ten people!. I think I was craving praise!. When I tried to explain myself wanting to be praised, I said that it was because I didn't get much normally-- which, now I think of it, is very untrue!. I hadn't drawn anything of substance in 7 months at the least; I had drawn out of a rare creative impulse!. Is it wrong to expect praise!?

And even stranger, (though I see myself and others do it a lot) is when I was praised, I denied it!. Person: "That's a good drawing" Me: "No it's not!.!.!."!. Even though I was proud, I denied that I thought it was good!. Did I do this to try and appear less selfish!? If I did, it's very see-through isn't it (hypocritical also!.!.!. AND, it is one of my pet peeves when people deny praise)!?

I find myself talking about myself a lot also!. Not technically bragging (though I admit I do that), but just talking about how I feel!. Complaining a lot also- "I'm freezing" (or hungry, hot, etc!.)!. Is this bad!? I really want to talk about other people, and other people only (But not gossip!)!.

I also talk to my friends about music!.!.!. "I think you might like this band!.!.!." In hopes of finding someone who appreciates the same stuff as I do!. But most of the time, they are content with the music they are listening to, and don't really have the time to listen to the songs I think they would like!. I'm not telling them to go look it up directly- I'm only telling them that because I have heard a song that is nice, and seems to suit their taste in music!. I should probably ask "Do you like!.!.!." instead of stating "I think you would like!.!."!. That or drop the subject completely!. There are two reasons why I tell them they would like something- one is that I genuinely think they would love it, and the other is hoping to find someone with the same interests as me!. Am I being selfish!?

The worst thing is: I'm thinking about how I'm not as bad as some other people, because I am aware of my selfishness!. Just that thought, makes me just as bad as selfish people who don't know (or care) that they are being selfish!. I know if I was just aware, but didn't think I was better off for being so, I would be much more "innocent"!. I do realize immediately whenever I have been selfish!.!. then I am automatically consumed with guilt!. The sad thing is, I'm asking for to be less selfish partially to get rid of this guilty feeling, so I can feel happier, which is quite selfish (the other part is to help the others around me)!.

So, how can I stop being so selfish, and start really helping other people, talking about other people instead of myself, quit complaining, and genuinely be a better friend/person!?

P!.S!. Was this a selfish question!?Www@QuestionHome@Com


Best Answer - Chosen by Asker:
Our society is selfish, greedy, corrupt and evil!. Look around you!. The billboards, the magazine covers, the tv commercials, the pop-up ads!. All designed to draw upon our greed, vanity, and selfishness!. Our government, our corporations, even the people driving in the street, all exhibit selfishness and self-centered behavior!.

We are all a product of a selfish and self-centered society!. It is no wonder we start wars, kill and maim people, steal from other countries, and belittle those who do not give us what we want!.

The fact that you recognize your behavior to be selfish and self-centered is actually a good sign!. You can change it!. Turn off the tv, the radio (except for NPR) throw out all those magazines with beautiful women who are photoshopped to perfection trying to ply products that will do nothing to change your soul!.

Work on yourself!. Selfish and self-centered behavior masks insecurity and low self-esteem!. Do volunteer work, ride a bicycle instead of driving a car, eat healthy and organic, bring your own bag to the grocery store, and find ways to make the world a less polluted, cleaner and safe place for children!.

I bet if you did these things, you would no longer feel selfish!. You would actually feel like your life was meaningful and worthwhile!.

Good luck!.Www@QuestionHome@Com

Check this out, I meticulously went through your question and you basically said "I" 42 times!!!!! Do you think that you're being selfish!? You can't even stop taking about yourself!Www@QuestionHome@Com

Try doing a random act of kindness anonymously!. Give to a charity without them knowing!. And see how it feels!.Www@QuestionHome@Com

I think this is not called selfishness!. :)Www@QuestionHome@Com

If u can stop eating THE FISH or the SHELL Fish from the SEA, u are oredi SELFishless! haha!.!.!.try it, it's work but it will not last long cos fish is tasty good!. hee hee!.Www@QuestionHome@Com

try relecting about what you do in life or with friends
{belife in you self}Www@QuestionHome@Com

yesWww@QuestionHome@Com

Wanting praise is not selfish, or wrong!.


Whenever I do art, which I am fairly good at, I hate when people praise it, even just slightly!. Because they are usually lying!. Because they do not notice all of the flaws that the creator notices!.



Nothing wrong with being selfish!. It is nature!.Www@QuestionHome@Com

I'm going to give you a strait answer!.

It is not wrong to be selfish!. Rational non-altruism is a good thing!. S K Duncan is wrong!.

You say you feel bad because you wanted praise for drawing a picture!. Now, did you want praise because you made it, or because it was good!. If it was good then you SHOULD want praise!. Is it wrong to want what you have earned!? You feel bad because you are concerned with yourself!. Why is that a bad thing!? It is only bad if you are attempting to get what you do not deserve!. It is also bad if you DONT want what you deserve!. You should be selfish, you should want what you deserve, not because you did something, but because you did something well!.

Some of the greatest people were selfish!. Abraham Lincoln was an openly an egoist!. Adolf Hitler was the 20th century's greatest altruist (He gave everything he had, his mind, his morals, six million jews, and the heart of his country to the aryan race; see if the dali lama can beat that)!. Some of the greatest inventions of history were made out of a sense of selfishness (AC current, the computer, the automobile)!. Some of the worst atrocities of all time were done out of selflessness (the crusades, communism, the holocaust, the 9/11 attacks)!. If everyone was a bit more rationally selfish (you can't be Truly selfish with out being rational, as irrationality will all ways eventually be detrimental to you're interests) the world would be a much better place, and you would be happier!.

And dont say selfishness is the root of all evil!. Reason is just as much a part of selfishness as self interest!. If you violate one person's individual right you loose you're own!. So it can never be rational, or selfish, to violate the rights of others!. No corporation who uses child slave labor is truely selfish!. No theif is truly selfish!. No murder is truely selfish!. They base their actions not on rational self interest but of the moment impulses!. What I am trying to say is this; selfishness is not doing what ever you want, selfishness is doing what ever is TRUELY in your interest!. also, helping others, or even the world as a whole, can be in your interest!. For instance: if one of my friends broke his ankle i would give him a ride to the hospital, selfishly!. My friends have values that 'I' admire, so I value them and their well being as an extension of my value for my self!.

And to answere you're last question, yes it was a selfish question!. You want to be a better person because that would be what is best for you, that in its self is selfish!. A truely selfless person would do any evil for humanity, sociaty, the race, ect!.!.!.

also, your take on altruism contradicts it's self!. Your view says that it is good to be selfless and that one should try to be selfless!. But trying to make yourself better would make you selfish, thus make you a worse person!. So trying to be a good person makes you a bad person!. So according to your views the only way to be a good person is to "right" thing without wanting to be a good person!. The only way you can get what you want is to not want it!.

That doesnt make much sense to me!.Www@QuestionHome@Com

lol yes its a selfish question!.!.!.!.
i know how you feel though
sounds to me you are in a time of you're life when you are trying to find yourself and who you really are and want to be and instead of looking within you are over analytical and look to others to define you!.Www@QuestionHome@Com