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Question: My 43 year old baby daddy is on drugs!?
he has cheated throughout our 7 year relationship - I'm 29 right now and he's 43!.!.we have 2 kids!.!.!.I want to know how do I stop him from having that puppy dog look on his face whenever he's coming down from a high begging me to come back to him, but when he's high he is no where to be found - we don't live together but he comes to my house to "see the kids", but really and truly he's there to check on me - I want to move to another state but not enough finance right now - I am still in love with him but trying to get over him but he knows I am weak for him that's why he plays these mind games - what can I do to be strong!? I am not ready for another relationship right now!.!.!.!.thank youWww@QuestionHome@Com
Best Answer - Chosen by Asker:
Each drug user is a unique human being and requires a unique strategy but there are some basic guidelines that might help!.
It's almost impossible to get someone else to kick drugs no matter how much you love them!. It's a battle that has to come from within!. What you have to do is present reasons to him as to why he has to kick and help him and encourage him to do so!.
Getting angry or turning him in will only alienate him!. Tell him that you love him but tell him that you won't put up with 'mind games'!.
People affected by addicts, and there are a lot of them, have to take care of themselves first and the addict second!. Thats not to say to abandon him but you have to care for yourself and your kids first and foremost!.
Not all drug users are dangerous!. Some non drug users are dangerous!. Humans are dangerous, not necessarily drugs!. Though depending on the drug and depending on the person it can be a bad mix!.
If you feel like you or your kids are in danger, then do what you can to protect yourself and your children!. If you think that your man is a danger to himself then do what you have to do to help him!.
Professionals can indeed help but be careful with that too!. You should do it with consultation with him and not behind his back (unless you are seeking help for yourself)!. If you go behind his back, he will feel betrayed and this might make things worse!.
The bottom line is that the addict has to want to change and until you get to that point there is no way to force him to change with or without professional help!.Www@QuestionHome@Com
get professional help!. this guy has been playing you!. sad it involves children!. he will hurt your children!. seek help quickly, he is dangerous!Www@QuestionHome@Com
I wouldn't let him have visitation rights to my kids if he was on drugs!. I'd try to get him court ordered to rehabilitation!. It doesn't sound like a very nice relationship but if you truly love him, then you should try to help him the right way!. He won't change unless he wants to but you CAN go through the court system and hope that by restricting his rights to see his kids, he will shape up and stay shaped up!. You need to be firm and be a parent, not a "oh, but I love him sooo much" person who keeps hanging on just to deal with the same **** everytime!. Life is short!. See a psychologist!.Www@QuestionHome@Com
you are selfish!.!.!. your kids come first, obviously not for you!. you are weak and pathetic!. first of all, get rid of the slang, 'baby daddy' you sound uneducated and dense!. grow up, get some self respect, some decorum and whip yourself into shape!. this is disgusting!. it is mothers like you that produce loosers into this society!. thanks a lot for bringing our society down!. it takes one person at a time to do it and lady, you are doing your part in every way, shape and form!. do us all a favor and get fixed, do not have anymore kids, you have no idea what your doing!. in short!.!.!. your an idiot!.Www@QuestionHome@Com