Position:Home>Philosophy> Is there any way to tell men who will give women freedom to aspire to be their f
Question: Is there any way to tell men who will give women freedom to aspire to be their full selves versus stiflers!?
I've often thought that women are like men---able to become self-actualized and then I realize when I talk to some men, their ideas of women are so narrowed and sexualized!. I understand women are sexy to men, but it does not end there!. I've even aspired to be unsexy so that I could have recognition of my other sides, but it was self-defeating!. As a woman, I must try to be everything--sexy, intelligent, and talented--in order to gain the respect of both women and men!. I think this somewhat distorted role of women!. Women should be able to pursue whatever it is they want without the "virtue" of being sexy, but this is NOT reality!.
So, I was wondering what I can do to try to differentiate men who allow women to self-acualize from the cave men who don't!.!.!. Are there distinguishing marks on the formers' foreheads!?Www@QuestionHome@Com
Best Answer - Chosen by Asker:
First problem - "As a woman, I must try to be everything--sexy, intelligent, and talented--in order to gain the respect of both women and men!." This entails you don't accept just what you are as you are!. You are comparing yourself to others rather than living with pride for what you are inside!. The only way of being true and finding someone that sees you for your deeper qualities rather than surface qualities alone is to be true to you!. This means to stop trying to make everyone happy, as the first should be your hopes and dreams and perhaps faith if you believe!. Secondly self-actualization is a Freudian term and most likely no matter how "aware" you become of yourself, a larger priority from my experience is first accepting what you are inside yourself (perhaps this is some of what you mean by self-actualize, for next time it may be better to explain what you mean in feelings rather than to use larger definable words so people can address the you, versus the term), as you will always see people who are ignorant and people who are full of love!. If you go in the direction of compassion and truth rather than just trying to be this or that - the "try" you speaking of, then you will find your ability to pursue whatever you can dream as well as to find the person who will love and respect a lady who is confident, caring, and at peace!. I suggest 15 minutes of meditation daily for two weeks than look at the question again!. Breathe in, breathe out, and say one!. Count as far as you can before a thought arises and sweeps you away!. Return to one, and begin again if you get completely taken away!. Follow the in breathe deeply like a thread of silk, and let the out breathe just flow, allow yourself to relax more and more from head to toe, each time you exhale!. Seriously - this works for finding purpose and ones place in life!.Www@QuestionHome@Com
I definitely agree that you need to learn to accept yourself for all you are!. I can relate to how you feel but I know there are guys out there that will care about your inner beauty!. You can"t get certain types of guys to be formed into what you want!. You have to go out and find the intellectuals!. I think it just takes getting to know the person and something I learned was, to ask myself if I am accepting them for all they are!.Www@QuestionHome@Com
Hello:
Ask them for detailed thoughts on feminism, that should make it more clear!.!.!.it should be a telling conversation, but be sure to listen to the details and not the yes or no answer!.
To add!.!.!.I am not sure if the same people that act as you describe would allow other men they speak with to retain their individuality or if they are objectified as women are!.!.!.I do not think this is all together sexism so much as the way their mind is set up!.!.!.people are seen as means and not ends!.!.!.
One way or another you will have to talk to them to find out
I hope this helps
Rev PhilWww@QuestionHome@Com