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Question: Who should buy the cemetary marker!?
I went to vist a friend tha passed away 3 months ago!. I had trouble finding exactly where he was buried, becuase he didnt have a marker!. I feel bad that he doesnt have one!. I wouldnt mind buying him at least a simple one, but feel like im out of my bounderies!. Could i do it anonymous!? Or just wait to see if his family buys him one!. I cant tell his family about it becuase we dont talk becuase of personal issues that have happened!?!?!?!? What do you think!?!?
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Best Answer - Chosen by Asker:
Generally, a marker or headstone is not placed until several months after the funeral!. The ground must settle first which usually leaves a depression which then needs to be filled in before a headstone is placed!. So, give it a year and then go back and check again!.

If, after a year, there still isn't a marker and you've check with the cemetery to make sure that one has not been arranged for, then you can go ahead and buy one for your friend!. Yes, you can do this anonymously!.

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UK answer!.
Here in the UK the person who purchased the grave would need to be notified as to your intention!. They alone are responsible for the head stone being erected, and you would need their permission as to the inscription, they have the right to have it removed if you do it without first consulting them!.
Here in the UK we cannot put anything onto graves unless they are six months old or over!.
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If, for some reason, you are unable to contribute a gravestone, you can create a memorial to your friend on findagrave!.com; registration is free!.
(You will need to register the name and location of the cemetery, if it is not listed on findagrave!.)
The plot number and the space number are optional, but will help others find the real grave in the future!. The cemetery office or funeral home will give you this information!.
Friends and loved ones can visit the memorial page and leave virtual flowers and/or military insignia, as well as, a note/memory, which can be viewed by others!.
There is also a special section for cremations!.
Just remember to create a factual, not personal, biography which can be viewed by future generations!. I use the information listed in the obituary from the newspaper!. Use the notes/memory section for personal messages; keeping in mind that it can be viewed by other vistors!.

My deepest sympathy for the loss of your friend!.
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Talk to the cemetery office to see if there is a marker being planned!.
They should be able to give you some advice!.
It is nice of you to want to buy a marker, but you need to be sure you are using the right process!.
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I'd wait until atleast a year has passed!. Many cultures and religions wait to mark the spot until the first anniversary of the death!.Www@QuestionHome@Com