Question Home

Position:Home>Genealogy> Which family member do miss the most, that has passed away?


Question:For me, its my great grandma. In my opinion, she was the strongest in my family, even though most disagree with me.


Best Answer - Chosen by Asker: For me, its my great grandma. In my opinion, she was the strongest in my family, even though most disagree with me.

That is easy, Big Mama, my maternal grandmother.

She was something else. She was not one of those frilly delicate granny types. She was more at home in a pair of tattered dungarees with a battered old straw hat working in her garden, tinkering with a car, or doing other outdoor work than she was in the house. She had a fiery temper and a generous nature. Mom says I inherited the worst of Big Mama's and Big Daddy's tempers. Both were quick to anger, but Big Mama's anger passed. Like Big Daddy, I know how to hold a grudge.

Don't get me wrong, she was a wonderful cook, I still dream about her biscuits and tea cakes. But she was not a gourmet cook by any definition, just plain old South Alabama country cooking. And she never turned anyone away from her table. Anyone who left her house hungry had only themselves to blame.

In her later years, especially, she sewed gorgeous patchwork quilts, and made some of the best fig preserves I've ever eaten. But I'll always remember her with a hoe, or an ax in her hand.

And talk about tough! Nobody messed with Big Mama a second time, and nobody messed with her family when she was around if they knew what was good for themselves. It could be dangerous. I can still remember a cold Saturday morning when I was 9 or 10. I'd gone back to Big Mama's when she came into town for some groceries. Shortly after we arrived, a local drunk came staggering into the yard and started talking to Big Daddy. Since Big Daddy didn't much like the man when he was sober, he didn't have much patience at all when he was drunk. After a few minutes, the drunk got argumentative, and Big Daddy got up from his chair and started toward the door, saying, "Go on George, I ain't got time to fool with you." George became abusive and threatening, challenging Big Daddy to come fight. I'd noticed Big Mama getting more and more angry as the incident progressed. When Big Daddy came in the house, George continued yell abuse and threats of coming in and beating Big Daddy ***. Then he made a near fatal mistake. He tried to make good his threats. When he pulled the screen door open and started to enter the house, his nose encountered the muzzle of a 12 gauge shotgun. Big Mama thumbed back the hammer and told him in no uncertain terms that he had a count of three to get off the property or he was a dead man.

The old cabin sat a good 100 yards from the road, and there was a big ditch between the yard and the road. It seemed as if George cleared that distance in about three steps and a jump across the ditch when he hit the road running. As he started to hit his stride, Big Mama elevated the muzzle of the old shotgun and fired well above George's head. I'd only thought George was running fast until that shotgun roared. I'd almost swear that he burned rubber picking up speed.

I'd been scared half to death during the later part of the encounter. But I will never forget what happened next. Big Mama set that old shotgun down on it's butt and nearly fell over laughing. She laughed until tears ran down her face and I was laughing right along with her.

She had been gone 20 years now, and I still miss her. She was one of the sweetest, most generous, most proud, and most fiercely protective people I've even known.

Doc

My Grandfather. He was a hilarious man to be around, and one of the most loyal and warm men i've ever known. My grandma gave him hell his whole life, and he never left her side.

I would have to say my Dad. I was only 19 when he died and I didn't have nearly enough time with him. He was a wonderful person and a great father. I still miss him and it's been almost 35 years since he died.

My Mema! She was both sweet and stern. She new exactly what she wanted a what she would tolerate and expected the best from everyone she met. She was a very powerful woman figure and the matriarch of our family. I miss her all the time, but am thankful that God took her in her sleep after a long and rich life.

my maternal grandmother, because we had a special bond. She died in 1993 but I still think of her often and wish she was still alive to talk to.

My father. He was the kindest, fairest, most honest hard working man that I've ever met. He was my best friend. I miss him very much.

Well...so far my Grandpa died.....But he died when I was 2 years old...so i barely know how he looks.

??? ommy mama my mother hope to go back to her soon

My Mama (MAW MAW) She was the best ever.
and Now that I am a MAMA I understand the special relationships you have with your grandchildren.
If I would have known, I'd have had them first.
You have so much more time and patience, and you are better off financially when you are grandparents.
you have more "experience" and the kids sense it.
You listen more and you pay better attention to them.
When My Grankids come I dedicate the whole weekend to them. I want them to remember me as fondly as I remember mine.

In the order they died:
My mother's sister who was only 42. My mother's mother in her 80's. My father's mother who was 87. My father's brother who just died last summer in his late 70's. One by one I'm losing all of my aunts and uncles as well as 3 cousins so far.

My "Granny Goose" as coined by my beloved, ever joking father. He sometimes called her "Lightning" as she always was back tracking for something she forgot and she was slow about it. I had the wonderful fortune of growing up with her as she lived with us. We shared the same room from age 3 to age 10. Then we each got our own rooms side by side

Well into my 30's she was my confindate who listened and seldom past judgement, but once in a while did a "tsk tsk" flick of the tongue or the lamented "Oh dear" if she thought it was over the top. She never actually judged you or anybody for that matter as she stated, "Only God has the right to judge you. I cannot, but just be ready to give Him good answers why you did that for when it is your time." All my friends LOVED her and called her Grandma too. Even all the neighbors and they were in their 30s and 40s at the time when I was 10.

>She taught me English and showed me how to write 1920's style cursive handwriting and how to be creative in arts and writing. My hobbies are reading, science, drawing, calligraphy, embroidery and beadwork, and learning.

>She let me crawl into bed and tell her all about the nightmare. She would agree it was frightful but she wouldn't let anything happen as I was there beside her.

>We did everything imaginable in science experiments and arts and crafts. Showed me how to make crystals grow. Also, showed me how to mix oil paint pigments and draw in charcoal

>Introduced me to black carbon paper. It was fascinating at the age of 7 because I could then duplicate ALL my drawings at the same time! Scanners were not even a glimmer into the future at this time

>Everytime I said "you know" she would respond ever so quietly, "I don't, but tell me". Boy, did I ever learn to drop that phrase as a substitute and it made me look for a way to better express my words which enabled another hobby, writing

>When I swore, she didn't punish me or yell at me me. Instead, everytime I did it, her response was, "I don't thnk you lack the intelligence to find a better word than a swear word, but I'll let you decide on that" It made me think harder and to this day, I still seldom swear. G'ma said it was ok to swear if it made sense in the sentence to use if for emphasis. Just don't do it haphazardly for no apparent reason as it assaults the senses which tends to make people go numb in hearing you. It made sense

>This was a woman who was in her 60s and announced "Tom Selleck of Magnum PI is a hunk!"

>She walked me through my very first menstrual period at the tender age of 12 where I was mortified, but she was calm and fashioned an "old time" clean rag into my first sanitary pad as we were not prepared for me to become a woman. She congratulated me on reaching the milestone, womanhood, and told me not only the changes of my body would be happening but the changes of responsibility would be happening too.

>She listened to my date and boyfriend problems, but did not lecture me about the fact I was having pre-marital sex. All she asked was. "Are you on the pill?" This was a woman whose generation ex-communicated you for such actions. Grandma was so progressive thinking

>At the young age of 64, she quit smoking COLD TURKEY. This act taught me that no matter your age, you are never too old to change old habits and modify your behavior.

> She taught me that you should be learning up to the last drawn breath to keep the brain, a muscle, well exercised

As she got older, a bit of dementia and mild hermit habits set in. So to keep her brain cells moving (she did crossword puzzles to her last breath, which is what I think kept her going until age 83) I would "bully" her to go out and shop and have dinner with me. She would say, "Why do you make me do this?" I would say, "Because if I didn't love you, I let you sit alone in your room doing nothing but watching TV and crosswords."

This was a woman outside of my strong-willed mother who influenced me throughout my life and was there with all her love and truly unconditionally. I had bought her wind chimes before her death. They were her favorite and she loved listening to them. After she died, they would tingle their bell tones, which would prompt me to say to my son, "That is your Granny Goose visiting us today" Hurricane Jeanne took them away and I haven't found chimes sounding quite like them yet to replace them, but they have been on my look out list as I do miss my Granny Goose's sounds when she visits me often in my thoughts and the actions I do today