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Question:

Do u have stuff in your head like this?

wound up tightly, ready to spring
release only comes from the drink
and the drugs stop me from being a prick
from a life time that smells just like stink
soundless thoughtsstirring within the head
look over now, ten people lay dead
broken words sold the midget said
the demonic monster will be fed
with a southern drawl the man he spoke
most people around here are good folk
social issues, paranoid on coke
please excuse me while i take a toke
the soldiers face all covered in scars
sitting so drunk in his local bar
hearing the voice of dead irish dah
round here things dont change, they are
sacrificed myself to pay the rent
im sure thats not what they really meant
emotionally got twisted and sorta bent
fighting back till im totally spent


Best Answer - Chosen by Asker: Yes. But without the drug references and the bad rhyming scheme.
Tighten the poem up a bit and leave a little more for the reader to imagine.