Sensory Remembrance....A poem....Would you please take a look?

Question:

Sensory Remembrance....A poem....Would you please take a look?

Sensory Remberance
(dedicated to my Grammy)

Your perfume lept into my nose today,
Reminding me of roses and jonquils
and tears sprang into my eyes
in remembrance of missing you.

Your carress flitted against the skin
of my cheek,
and I stopped to look around.
You are not here, but you are not far.
My heart feels your love all the time.

A white cloud zoomed in
as the focus of my eye
and it brought your white locks into my mind.
Many an hour I would spend watching you curl
them into your beautiful coif.

Your whispering praise sang in my ear,
but I know that you are only whispering
to the angels.

The taste of hazelnut coffee danced on
my tongue the other evening,
and I now wish that I had you to share the
stories of your past to go with the cup of joy,
which is my life.

Best Answer - Chosen by Asker: I like the choices you've made here. You have some effective concrete images. I like that you opened with smell because that actually is supposed to trigger memory--it felt very real, like we were being let into the moment with the narrator.

I appreciated flitted. It made your grandmother's touch seem like an elusive hummingbird..

The hearing strophe seemed a little incomplete, not bad by any means, but I wanted more there.

Hazelnut coffee: Wonderful.

to go with the cup of joy, which is my life.

That was a very satisfying ending. I liked the uplifting feeling in light of a sad event.

Thank you for sharing this.