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How do whales mate? Please write as hilarious as you can!?

I have to do a website-project for christmas. I drew the topic "whale mating". Now I could fill the website with all the science stuff - but thats boring.
It would be much more fun to have some funny answers. And thats what I am asking you for: Please write an answer about anything thats related to whale mating (i.e. how do they meet, first kiss, etc).
Short and hilarious would be really cool.
Please watch: The best answers will be posted at http://whale-mating.jimdo.com
So if you answer you agree you allow me to post them there Looking forward to your answers, Matze


Best Answer - Chosen by Asker:

The gay ones bite the ends off of submarines and suck out all the seamen.